Okay, I’ve finally decided to stop procrastinating and to sit down and articulate (to the best of my ability) all of the excitement and craziness that is going on in my life right now. Blogging has always intimidated me, and I prefer to read my creative and witty friends’ blogs (you know who you are, Mia). But don’t worry, there’s an iced-mocha next to me for fuel (my newest obsession thanks to my roommate, Jeanette), so here we go. Welcome to my first ever blog!!
This past year has been anything but easy for me. And if you don’t believe me, just read some of my journal entries. (Just kidding, I hope you never do that.) I think probably anyone looking at my life from the outside might be a little confused as to why I would leave the life I have now for something so out of the ordinary as the World Race. A great job with the school system in Orlando, degrees in Social Work and plenty of opportunities to use them, incredible friends and community, a comfortable home living with great roommates, and family living close by. Really, it’s like I’ve had it all laid out before me. But if I’m honest, I have had a deep stirring inside of me for quite some time that God is calling me to something else. It has been a difficult year of pleading with the Lord about what it is He wants for me right now. I admit that I had hoped the perfect job would have been laid out for me by now, doing something that I loved and felt fulfilled doing in every way. Who doesn’t want that, right? But the God I know cares more about my character and my heart than he does about handing me the perfect set of circumstances, so of course that hasn’t happened yet. 
If you know me, you know that there’s not much I love more than experiencing other cultures and to see them know the love of God. (My 3 months in Haiti was life-changing and everyone knows my fascination with all-things Spanish.) I think diversity is so beautiful and I love how God is experienced differently throughout the world. This is something I want to be a part of. As I was reading through some of my old journal entries, I came across one from January 25, 2016. It was based on one of Summit’s series for singles, and this particular talk focused around the idea of time and how we can use it in a way that is glorifying to God. As I consider my current season of life, much of which has been filled with confusion and a lack of direction, it’s easy to just hope that one day I’ll hear the audible voice of God, everything in life will make sense, and all my “dreams” will come true. But I read a note in my journal that I wrote following this Summit talk that said, “The lie of ‘You’re not as valuable today as you will be one day’ is not the voice of God”. I admit that I have fallen into the belief that I need to wait for a time when I am more put-together, more spiritual, and when my life looks a little better. But will that day ever come? Probably not. Not on this earth at least. I am always in need of more and more grace, and thank the Lord that he is constantly giving it. I decided that I don’t want to keep pushing this desire deep down inside of me further and further down.
As most things in life goes, once I decided to take that step, my life seemed to become filled with even more temptations to follow the things of this world, the things that I REALLY wanted in the moment. I began to listen to the lies of the enemy telling me that maybe now is not the time, maybe I should stay put for a while until I’m more prepared…
But, I know that now is the time for me to take the leap of faith and pursue what the Lord has placed specifically in my heart and to follow the command we are all called to as followers of Him. Those who may be looked at as “the least of these” by others are deeply treasured in the eyes of God. I have decided to obey his command to go and to love and serve. And I pray that through this experience I will learn to trust in the Lord like I never have had to before, all while experiencing real and raw community with a group of people who are seeking the same thing as me.
Thank you so much for your partnership with me and in the work that God is already doing. I don’t want this to be only an 11-month experience, but pray that it will serve as a catalyst to a life serving Him, whether back in Orlando or somewhere else in the word. I’m thankful that he WANTS to use me. Me of little faith, full of doubts. I need him so much, every second of every single day. His love for me is beyond my comprehension, and I only pray that I can show a glimpse of this love to others. Stay tuned for more updates!
