Life on the race is a bittersweet adventure.
The excitement of each country, ministry and culture is an incredible blessing, but the thoughts of home and my life at home minus me can be hard to swallow at times.
More specifically, life on the race is bittersweet because no matter how amazing each ministry is you can’t help everyone.
From street children in Romania, to children not sponsored by Compassion International in the Dominican, I can’t help my heart from breaking whenever I see a need. If having a compassionate heart is a good thing, then why does it hurt so much? I’ve worked with many amazing ministries, but I have quickly learned just how limited these two hands are.
More recently my heart broke on a ride to Maputo (the capital) with our Beacon of Hope boys. As the bus filled with 12 racers and 7 beacon of hope boys all laughing and singing drove through the city, we were bombarded at each stop light by young men trying to sell everything from toilet paper to dog collars to world maps. My heart sunk a little as I realized that this was their life. They probably weren’t given the opportunity to further their education. They probably don’t know where all their meals are coming from. They might not even know how it feels to have someone believe in them and their dreams. My heart welled up with relief that our boys are safe…Angie’s boys are safe. But I had to fight the overwhelming urge to open that bus door and let all the boys in. I wanted them all to know the security and love that Beacon of Hope provides, but I couldn’t do it.
As hard as it is for me to come to terms with, I am only one person. I can’t save everyone. I can’t rewrite every system I disagree with. I can’t give every orphan a home. I can’t feed every hungry mouth. But I serve a God that is bigger than pain, bigger than sin, bigger than hunger, bigger than abandonment, bigger than this world. So although I am limited, I serve a God who isn’t. All I can do is love with the heart He given me, serve with the hands Hes blessed me with, and go where He tells me to….and then trust that He will do the rest.
Also just a quick reminder, I am currently still $3,000 away from my July 1st deadline. I know my adventure is not over, and God will provide. If you would please consider supporting me, praying for me, or even sharing my blogs I would greatly appreciate it!
