Dear Papa,
I remember it clearly. The day was January 14 and I had just gotten back from a meeting that literally changed the course of my life! Prior to that day, Papa, you know that I had been living in the Vally of Death for about a year and a half. The days seem to be characterized by low days and even lower days. There were points during that dry spell when I wanted to give up and just end it all. THE END. That's all I wanted… But on that particular day in January, after months of crying in bed when all seemed to be lost, you grabbed my hand and reminded me that you never let go… and that you never will. And papa, that is when I realized that even though it appeared as though I was walking alone in the desert for what appeared to be eternity, you had actually cradled me in your loving arms so I would not get burned a la Footprints in the Sand.
You moved a towering mountain in my life. And as I sat down on the floor, rejoicing and praising your name, you led me to pick this verse from my Daily Bread promise box. "Whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst."- John 4:14 Papa, when I started reading the story of the Samaritan Woman, I knew that this was a divine appointment. In John 4: 6 it says "Jesus, tired from his journey, sat down there at the well. It was about noon." At that very moment, I jumped up from the floor and ran to look at the clock. It was exactly 12 o'clock….noon!!
Papa, you know exactly what I need when I need it. And you know just how to make the flood gates open. Because in that blessed moment, as I was bathing in my tears, it dawned on me that I was the Samaritan woman. I was the woman because I felt so unworthy of your grace and your forgiveness. I was ashamed at who I became and what I was living for. But still you looked upon me with pitying eyes, you showed me your merciful love and you redeemed me. And Papa, just as I was tired from the journey, you were tired too because all along you were carrying my cross for me.
It was on that glorious day that I surrendered my life up to you. It was on that day that I died to myself so that I could live unto you, Papa.
Three days later you gave me a call in the form of a prophesy from a close friend. He told me, "I saw a white door…if you can imagine light shining so bright through the cracks of the doors…you're looking at this door. The Lord tells me not to be discouraged. The white door represents an adventure you've been praying about and he's granted you this prayer. He's working with you, and wants to show you how to open the door because he knows once it's open, you're spirit will jump straight in. The journey is for you to seek God deeper in your secret place. The holy spirit tells me that God brings happiness and you seeking him…he will show you how to open the door. it's a short period for you to settle and pray and have a stronger relationship with him."
The second time you called, Papa, it was through another prophesy in Santa Nella at a deliverance and healing gathering as I was on my way back to Washington state–another divine appointment. I was called out of the crowd by a jovial gentleman name Bill and asked, "What do you do?" I replied, "I just graduated from college and I'm headed back home." He said, "What do you want to do??" I told him, "I just want to travel and help the poor." He called me up to the front. I must say, Papa, I was uneasy and unsure at first. My mind was racing with doubt, uncertainty, and indecision. But just as soon as those things crept into my mind, the sooner they left along with the tears rolling down my face, as Bill and his partner laid hands on me. That's when I felt your loving embrace, Papa. That's when I knew.
Through the Holy Spirit they told me this:
1. I will travel the nations, help the poor, provide provisions for the hungry, and heal the sick
2. I will be given provisions
3. I will have sensitivity to hear the holy spirit
4. I will have the voice to speak into the spirit
5. The eyes to see into the spirit
6. I will speak the secret in peoples heart
7. I will be able to speak tongues and I will be baptized in the Holy Ghost
My hands had been activated that night, Papa. My ears, my eyes, my lips…they had all been activated. Words cannot express how loved and at peace I felt. Once again, I vowed to do your will, Papa, not my own. A part of me was hoping that my calling would be through the World Race, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. So I offered it up to you and knew that if it was your will, you would open those doors for me.
The third call came on March 7th. But this time it was an invitation. I was basking in the morning sun, soaking up all the vitamin D I could get before it started raining like the weatherman said it would. I felt great!! I looked up at the sun briefly, smiled and went to my room. Just as I entered my room, the phone rang! (FYI i dislike answering calls from phone numbers that are unfamiliar to me. So I googled the area code, trying to figure out if it was a telemarketer number…you know..it's kinda like catching the ding-dong-ditcher before they ditch you!) I bet you were having a field day, Papa, when you saw my reaction to the phone call! You got a kick out of it for a few seconds longer and then you told me to the answer the phone! Thank goodness I listened to you because it was my acceptance call into the September route for the World Race!! It was the key that I needed to open the white door that you brought to my attention a month and a half beforehand!
Papa, thank you for being patient with me! Thank you for saving me from the barren desert and for filling me up with living water! As in the book of Romans I ask, if you are for me, Papa, who can be against me?? What will separate me from your love, Papa? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword?? I know now that the answer is absolutely nothing, Papa. Absolutely nothing!!
Love,
Your thirsty* daughter
*Side note: Paradoxically, although by drinking from the spring of Christ’s living water we shall never
thirst (John 4:14), the healthy believer should be thirsting continually for more of Christ. John Piper resolved this enigma by concluding that when we drink this living water, ‘it makes a spring in you. A spring satisfies thirst, not by removing the need you have for water, but by being there to give you water whenever you get thirsty’. The spring within is, of course, the indwelling Spirit of God (John 7:37-39).
