So I haven’t written a blog in about a month because I have been struggling with the following things:
- doubt
- trying to please people over pleasing God
- confusion
- temptation
- discouragement
- loss of spirit
My dear friend, if you are struggling with any of these then keep on reading, I’m about to lay my heart out for you so you know you are not alone in any of this.
– I have my doubts that I can even raise enough money to go on the race. My launch isn’t until July 2015 but time flies and money doesn’t exactly grow on trees.
– I have several family members and friends that are very very close to my heart and the majority of them are telling me to finish school before I go on this 11 month mission trip. None really understand how important this is to me and I don’t think they are being stubborn to purposely hurt me. I just think they don’t want me to go.
– Confusion can stem from a multitude of things but mine is coming from wondering if I should just finish my last 6 semesters of school or finish what I started.. the world race. Everything inside of me is saying to go on the world race, finish what I have already started and everything outside of me (the world) is saying I am going to waste a year pushing back my graduation.
– Here is the ugly one. Temptation. I have been tempted to stay at home where I am comfortable and don’t have to worry about raising $16,000 dollars. I have also been tempted to date when I know I’m in a season of being single and don’t get me wrong dating is a wonderful thing but I want to date someone who is going to lead me to Jesus… not their bed.
– I suppose I could put discouragement and loss of spirit in the same little paragraph thingy because they pretty much go hand in hand. I am feeling discouraged because this is something that I feel is so right for me but everyone is telling me to be realistic. I haven’t done a ton of fundraising either because I’m mostly scared that no one will want to help out and rejection is something I am not good at dealing with… especially when it comes to something I love so much.
As I was typed out the words “I’m mostly scared” a verse automatically popped into my head that kinda made me feel silly/stupid to even think fear was stronger than Our Father…
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7
This is SO TRUE but only if you believe it! Only if you let God work in your life and stop trying to take things into your own hands. I am very very guilty of taking things into my own hands instead of letting God do what He wants to do. Every time I do something on my own it leads me down paths of confusion, regret and temptation; but when I let God work through me He leads me down paths of joy, happiness, redemption and, if I listen real closely, wisdom.
Yall, we are all struggle. Christian or non christian. Believer or non believer, life will not be easy. But I can guarantee you if you are following Jesus He will take every bullet that comes your way. Yes, you will feel a little pain when that gun goes off but you will not suffer the full injury.
Every time I feel lost and don’t know what to do with my life or time I think about the book of Galatians (my favorite book up to date). If you haven’t read this book yet or if you have never even heard of it let me give you a little run down of what it’s all about.
* Paul writes a letter to the people of Galatia to encourage them to remember that within Jesus Christ they are free. Previously they were under the strict laws of the Old Testament and Paul wanted to remind them that though the laws are very important they are not everything. By following all the laws you cannot go to Heaven if you don’t have faith or love. Love is everything. He encourages them to have faith and to love everyone as they love themselves.
Man, I’m excited to share these verses with you. Check them out! Something will speak to you!
“But when God who from my birth set me apart and called me by His grace, was pleased to reveal His Son in me, so that I could preach Him among the Gentiles.” – Galatians 1:15-16
“For through the law I have died to the law, so that I might live for God. I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself for me.” – Galatians 2:19-21
“But in the past, when you didn’t know God, you were enslaved to things that by nature are not gods. But now, since you know God, or rather have become known by God..” – Galatians 4:8-9
“Christ has liberated us to be free. Stand firm then and don’t submit again to a yoke of slavery.” Galatians 5:1
I encourage you to stand up for your dreams. If you believe that your dream is God given then who can stop you? Certainly not me or anyone on this Earth.
Remember that you are free because God says so. Remember you are enough because God says you are. Remember you are strong because God says so. Remember you are beautiful because God says you are worth more than rubies. Remember that you are loved beyond what you can fathom because God thinks you are just too darn awesome to give up on!
If God isn’t going to give up on us then we shouldn’t give up on Him and what He’s capable of. Let go and let God!
Love,
Mariah
