“Abide in Me” Jesus says. “Remain in Me. Return everything back to Me. Be nourished by Me–for I am the vine that you are given life through. You bear fruit only through Me, and you can only grow and become more like Me, when you continue to abide in Me. I am the Life-Giver and when you are in Me, you bear the fruits that bring about the flourishing life that is alive in you.”
The Lord gave me this sight the other morning of a mountain and trees. In this place, I came to the bottom of this mountain with my arms full of everything I was trying to carry, trying to balance and in a sense trying to keep alive. I knew that I couldn’t carry it all any longer and I realized that those very things in my arms would soon die if they stayed in my control. As I came to this place I fell on my knees and dropped everything down on the ground. In that moment everything was still, everything was out of my control, yet I was filled with so much peace.
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Honestly I’ve come to see that whenever I have a “me” focus, I haven’t been truly abiding in Jesus. The problem is a mixture of both my actions and also my perspective which shouldn’t be set on myself and my limited sight nor my limited ability. In one aspect I am trying to carry and hold all these things of life in my tiny arms. I have a heart willing to grow, but sometimes I have a hard time letting the Lord be the one to prune and nourish certain branches of my life and of myself in the way He wants to do that. In the other aspect the Lord is in fact pruning me, no matter how tightly I try to hold on to my expectations of how that’s done. At times I see the branches being cut off and it scares me because I can’t fully see and understand why those branches have no purpose; and then at times I know that specific branches have no purpose but I know that cutting them off will be difficult and painful to endure.
Pruning is tough, no matter what it is. Because what is being pruned is something that is apart of us that is being stripped away. Whether its emotionally, spiritually or physically; it is going to be painful and not our first desire to want to go endure. But the beauty of the Lord trimming us is that we are being made more like Jesus, and in return we bear the fruits that outwardly shows that transformation and connection with Him.
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.” John 15: 1-4
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This time before the race has felt like way more than just “preparation”; because I see that the Lord is already stripping away parts of me that are not of Him right where I am at. He is at work now and growing me in ways that I know will become even more prevalent when I do leave. I won’t have certain comforts to fall back unto in those moments and there will be a completely newness to this whole experience that I will have to come to learn. But I know that just as much as I’ll need Jesus in those moments (that I have no idea will come), I need that same life-nourishing Jesus now. Because without Him, it all will wither away and die in my hands. I will not be able to truly love with Christ’s love without Him abiding in me and I in Him. I will not be able to be vulnerable even when I fears overwhelm me, I will not be able to be joyful during the trials, I will not be able to have a peace in the storm, I will not be able to have faith and trust in the Lord when plans fall through…..unless I abide in Christ.
Whatever the pruning will be and as much as I don’t/won’t always understand, I am truly pumped to see the fruits that the Lord will bear and to see those fruits in the future from the places He is pruning now. I’m super excited to experience more of who He truly is and that life He brings. AND with Training camp in less than a month away, I will finally meet my squad that I will be doing life with in this next year. These are all people that are being pruned and nourished just as much as I feel like I am. Each has a truly amazing story that I have either been able to learn about or will come to know. I’m excited to see how He will trim us to be more like Him, and the harvest that He will bring forth for His honor and glory.
You and I are just the branches. Jesus is the vine (John 15:5). He is the focus. I know that without the vine, I am truly nothing. Because without Him I see that nothing in my life will fully flourish. He calls us to abide in Him, knowing that He is the life line we need and that He is the focus and reason through it all.
