It really just hit me the other day, my whole life I felt like I deserved all the things that I had. I really believed that I did something to deserve the things that I had.
And God told me: How dare you ever think that you didn’t anything to deserve what was freely given to you…
That hit me really hard. But it was true. Because what did I do
I didn’t choose or deserve to be born in the city or state where I was born.
I didn’t choose or deserve my family.
I didn’t choose or deserve to attend school.
I didn’t choose or deserve a lot of things, but so much was given to me.
I have two amazing parents who love me and who have provided for me my entire life.
I have never been hungry or thirsty a day in my life.
I have had the opportunity to pursue every dream of mine.
BUT they didn’t choose these things and they certainly don’t deserve this.
My heart just broke because how could I think for so long that I deserved or even at times was entitled to the things I had. I’m blessed. Everything good thing that I have ever had in my life was a blessing from God (James 1:17).
For a few minutes I was just sad and I was sorry. I was sorry that I had ever felt that way. And I just started asking God, “Why me God? Why me God?” Why was so much given to me? God showed me it was so I would sit and be sad that I had been give so much. He showed me that the reason I had been given so much was so that I in return could give.
Jesus says in Matthew 10:8 “Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons. Freely you have received, freely give.”