Wednesday, April 24th, 2019.
I woke up that morning to the announcement that someone from every team needed to be prepared to share a message at the three houses we were going to visit that day. I kinda just flipped open my Bible to Ephesians and said, sure I’ll do it. Not really putting much thought into what I would share. Thinking to myself, “Well God, you speak through me… from Ephesians”. And going on my way, I got into the back of the pick-up truck, with massive rain boots on, Bible in hand and the other hanging on for dear life!
The hike alone took an hour each way, even after being dropped off. Hiking in the sun and hearing the Holy Spirit whisper to me to talk about love but ignoring it completely because I wasn’t really listening. It was such a beautiful hike even if it was hard. I loved putting on rain books preparing for the mud and bringing my Bible preparing for battle. I loved walking and adventuring with these people. It was so much fun to get to know people better as we walked.
We rounded a corner and came to our destination. This little house was raised above the ground with wood to withstand the rain. Coming to the door and taking off our boots, we all flooded into their covered porch area.
Diego, our ministry host, explained why we went to these specific houses and not others. It’s because these are the ones who can’t get to church and for that reason we bring the church to them!
We sang worship songs…. actually more like ‘butchered’ singing worship songs in Spanish. But they had incredible grace and enjoyed it anyways. Diego talked for a bit of who we are and what we are doing. Then, they called my name. My heart skipped a beat as I got up and walked to the front, praaayinggg so hard for God to give me something.
I opened to Ephesians and started talking. I honestly don’t remember what I said and about 10 minutes in, God said, speak about love. So I did. Mid-sentence I said, actually God wants me to speak about love and I believe that is for a purpose. That purpose is your family and they need to be reminded about love. I shared what I learned the night before (in my, “What Church Looks Like in Talamanca, Limon, Costa Rica”). How we’re told all the time just how much God loves us but do we actually feel the weight of it? Do we ever just sit and feel God’s love? Really focusing on each word of 1st Corinthians 13. Especially after all the poetic parts and we get to the part that says, love never fails. Wow! God’s love never fails us! We can remain in that love, remain in that promise every single time human love fails.
As I talked I felt doubt creeping in because the family was completely unresponsive. I didn’t know what to do but to keep going. I didn’t know if this was touching their hearts at all or not. But I kept going. When I finished and I looked around at all my squad mates complete unworthiness filled my soul. My message wasn’t perfect in the eyes of the world, scattered and I switched subjects but Jesus had something to say to that family about love.
Walking away from that house and realizing how hard it is to live out the word ‘vessel’. We sing it in worship all the time, “make me a vessel” but to actually be in the moment and ready to literally say WHATEVER He tells us too. To take yourself and your feelings completely out of the situation to let God work. To not let yourself get in the way of the Almighty King and what he wants to say through us. That’s big stuff. To not care how people react, wether it be a straight face or persecution; having the tools to be firm in our faith. I know I stumbled in my worth in that moment, past stereotypes coming to life of not being knowledgeable enough to share in front of all my incredibly smart squad mates. God had to remind me and affirm me in who I actually was. To remind me that I have the same Holy Spirit as all my fellow New Testament brothers and sisters. That I am deemed WORTHY!
Then, after I finished, we asked them some questions, finding out this family has a disabled son which is the reason why they can’t get to church. In fact, they have carried him, at his age of 18 years old to go to church which is miles uphill. We asked if we could pray over him. As we entered into this tiny little room with a young man on the bed. I immediately saw his extended ankles and wrists from no movement, my heart broke. Physical therapy is what he needed and that is all I saw. My mind was filled with sorrow for him as I thought of the restrictions he had. I started praying for healing over his body. As I was praying God asked me why I was doing that and how he had made him exactly how he was. He didn’t need to be fixed. In fact, God revealed to me that I had absolutely no idea how God touches that young mans heart but I believe it’s a beautiful supernatural connection because the second we said “Jesus” the young man lit up!
So, if I couldn’t pray for healing, I decided to pray for his body in heaven.
We are told that our bodies are made new in heaven so I prayed for that.
Again, God asked why I was praying for this. Yes, he will get a new body but even if he didn’t why would it change him in any way. He is perfect in every single way to me(God) and you need to stop putting what you see as a “perfect life or a perfect body” onto him. He will see things you will never see because his bond with me is incredible.
Woah.
After that I didn’t know what to pray for so I just starred at him. As he smiled up above us. Wondering if he was smiling at angels… then I started to rejoice in this child of God who lives a life with the only thing that fulfills us. Yes, he can’t walk. Yes, he can’t talk. Yes, he lives in pain. Yes, he does nothing all day. Yes, he has nothing. But none of that matters. None of it because he has the only thing that matters, Jesus. Not a house. Not a Gucci belt. Not fame. Not money. Not human love. Not a social security number or a retirement plan. He doesn’t have any of those but he literally has it all.
Really gives perspective on how we live – coming back into a fast pace culture where everything is about ourselves. No reason God can’t reach us…but maybe we are the unreachable and not people around the world. Maybe we need more of Jesus than the people around the globe in mud huts and shacks because at least they understand what it means to be dependent on Him above. Watching the people worship God all over the globe. They get it. They dance, they scream, they are rejoicing because they understand that “I am the way, the truth, and the life and no one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). Really makes me think, is God pleased with how Americans live? I’m not talking about non believers, I’m talking to the ones who go to church, who proclaim they follow Jesus, who do all the “right things”. I mean that has been me most of this race and I wasn’t UNTIL I decided to have an intimate relationship with my Father where I started to understand what it means to follow him. Doing things not because it’s right but because I am so head over heels in love with Jesus that I can’t wait to spend time with him, to surrender and submit, to live for him. Absolutely nothing compares.
Wow, God had a lot to say about this.
Moving on.
After we left the house we walked the hike back to the truck.
Came home and made a wonderful lunch!
Then walked to the locals soccer field and played so much soccer and sweated through all my clothes. It was SO MUCH FUN!
We started against each other and then as more time went on more and more locals joined. They had their own team and we had two teams. Every time a team would score the losers would switch out for the team that was out. The locals only went out twice… haha! But it was soooo much fun because no one cared at all about winning, there was no competitiveness, therefore, we played in love!!
After we finished, Davis my squad mate shared a message, we played duck duck goose and they absolutely loved it!
A little girl was sitting in my lap as we made art in the grass, it was such a good time. 🙂
Walked home.
Ate dinner, Played some cards, and ended the day in worship. That’s something I absolutely loved about Talamanca. We were constantly worshipping. Being reminded who we worked for and being filled by him.
Going to bed with a bug net, so, so, so thankful for that bug net.
I rejoice in the Lord for bug nets!
Such a good day.
Thank you all for reading. I pray your perspectives are changing and you open your mind and heart willingly to Christ.
Amen.
God bless you all!
