Sometimes I really hate myself.
And I’m not talking about the kind of self hatred you feel after polishing off a bag of chips and guacamole. The kind of self hatred I’m talking about can only be experienced from thoughts and feelings that go far beyond your own personal control.
For as long as I can remember I’ve had this twisted sense of compassion. What I mean by that is I often times feel bad for people I want to hate. Although it’s going to be wildly unpopular to proclaim this right now, I’m going to just come right out and say it…
I feel bad for the Charleston shooter.
Whether it was a tragic childhood or faulty neurobiology we may never be certain, but something must have gone horribly wrong in this young man’s life to lead him to engage in such horrific acts. While what he did is inarguably despicable, he is human. He is a part of our Father’s beloved creation.
We are taught to love the sinner and hate the sin. I think what trips us up as a society often times is our hastiness to see the speck of sawdust in our brothers eye while paying no attention to the plank in our own.
My heart goes out to the family and friends of those whose lives were taken at Emanuel African Methodist Eiscopal Church on Wednesday; it’s a tragedy that I can’t even begin to fathom going through. But my heart also breaks for the 21 year old shooter and the events in his life that may have shaped his decisions two days ago.
As Christians we’re called to love others the way Jesus did. The fact of the matter is that the love Christ displayed was selfelss and unconditional to ALL people.
On the race it will be easy to love those who have been wronged- the attention starved, abandoned orphan or young woman rescued from sex trafficking. As I begin this journey, I’m praying for a heart that continues to love those the world hates- the pimp soliciting young women or the young mass murderer.
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32
TRAVEL UPDATE-
On Thursday, June 25 I will be flying to Atlanta with my parents to spend the weekend with my brother who lives in South Carolina. On Sunday we will head to the World Race Launch and on July 1 I will be making my way to India!!! Please pray for safe travels for all.
