The World Race is a funny thing. It’s only month one but already I have been stretched and grown so much more than I ever knew I needed to be.
This calling is damn hard. It’s not for the weak; those who enjoy the safety of staying in their comfort zone. It’s not for the guarded; those afraid of living in community. And it’s definitely not for the greedy; those who cannot bear the thought of giving all of themselves to people in desperate need of Christ’s love.
One promise that I can confidently make to all of you at home is that the version of me that you remember will not be stepping off of that plane in May because my heart will always be elsewhere. In an essence, I’m not coming home.
A piece of me is with Anita; a little girl who loved to spin around while we danced, hold my hand walking through her village, and shower me in kisses.
A piece of me is with the seven year old child labeled as “dumb” by her village. She may not be able to speak, but she worships beautifully with a sound the Lord delights in.
A piece of me is with all of the kids who come from families that can’t afford to put clothes on their backs.
A piece of me is in the rows of stick and straw houses that comprise many villages.
A piece of me will forever be with my teammates; the people I now call my family and whom I can’t imagine this journey without.
I will never give someone a thumbs up without being reminded of drinking a ‘thumbs up’ soda pop under the shade of a lemon tree in India.
Finger foods will always take me back to eating with my hands for every meal.
Never again will I wrinkle my nose at using a port-a-potty after using a squatty potty for a month.
Seven days; one week. That is all it took for God to completely wreck me and begin to mold my heart after his own. I’ve seen the poorest of the poor but the richest in spirit. I’ve seen the orphaned and widowed but an unfailing love. I’ve seen God work in incredible ways but have questioned where he is in other circumstances. I’ve learned that I’ll never be able to comprehend why things happen the way that they do, but know that I serve a God who is perfect in all of his ways. And while I may not be able to fix all of the problems of the world or even of a small village, I can give all that the Father fills me with to those in need.
The girl returning to her home in eleven months will still have her same sense of adventure, smart-allic humor, driven work ethic, passion for life, and love of laughter. But she will also come back completely unrecognizable. For she’s now a justice seeker, a fighter, a bringer of joy and of truth, a girl on a mission; a World Racer.
This trip is in no way some glamorous vacation in which I get to escape life for a year. In fact, often times it’s not pretty at all. I’ve discovered that an adventurous life doesn’t necessarily mean bungee jumping from bridges or hiking big mountains. Sometimes the true challenge lies in taking the risk to leave a piece of yourself behind in all of those you meet along the way. For me, that’s where the real adventure is.
In the short amount of time I have spent on the field I’ve gone through a whirlwind of emotions. I’ve broken down over the fact that my parents are no longer a simple phone call or text message away to help or comfort me. I’ve cried rereading an email from my boyfriend for the hundredth time. I’ve gone to tell an inside joke and teared up after realizing my best friend isn’t here to share in the humor with me. I’ve felt the closest I ever have to God and then never felt more distant from him the very next day. I’ve realized how tremendously blessed I am in every way and plan on never taking my blessings for granted again.
Although I came into this knowing it would be hard, the reality of my life for the next eleven months hit me way harder than I ever expected. But when it comes down to it, I wouldn’t trade this opportunity for anything. I’ve been forced to trust my heavenly Father in ways that I would never be able to had I stayed at home. He has become my comfort and strength in the hard times and source of joy through the good.The opportunity to serve “the least of these” has filled gaps in my heart that I didn’t even know were there.The good moments will always outweigh the bad and I know that God has brought me here “for such a time as this”. I’ve hardly scratched the surface of this adventure but can already promise you it was the best decision of my life.
“As we lose ourselves in the service of others we discover our own lives and our own happiness.” -Dieter F. Uchtdorf
