This morning our squad found out we are going back to America due to the severity of the corona virus as well as borders closing. Being sent home two months early was never something I would have imagined as being part of this journey. I’ve wrestled through lots of confusion and questions, asking the lord why he would send me out to bring me back home to a world in chaos with a 24 hour notice. I’ve asked him why I have to say bye to my squad mates, my best friends and family so suddenly, to be completely uprooted of my community and the life I’ve loved on the race so dearly with no warning. I could ask the lord a million questions about why the virus has gotten this bad, why the world seems to be shutting down, and people are dying. But through it all, I hear his still small voice, “be still, and know that I am God.” This virus is bringing not only our nation but our world together. The global church is uniting in prayer, it’s bringing people to their knees in humility before our almighty creator, acknowledging our need for a savior and for healing. It’s bringing us from privilege and greed to a state of dependence, and it’s helping us to see the people around us and to care for them and see them as precious and worthy of life. I still have a lot of questions and have been entering into the lord’s presence with lots of confusion and anger, but he meets me with so much grace and always reminds me that he’s in control of all of this. He is my refuge when I have nothing else to cling to. Our squad leaves tomorrow morning for Los Angeles where we will have a couple days to debrief and process all that’s happened these last 7 months before we go home. My heart is breaking for Thailand, Malaysia, my squad mates, and the two months of the race I won’t get to experience, but my heart is also so full from the 7 months I’ve had the privilege of experiencing. The lord has blessed me with so much abundance, so much more of his presence and fullness than I ever thought imaginable, and I’m so thankful for all that he’s given me. Yes, my heart is heavy, yes I’m grieving the best 7 months of my life and the people I’ve come to love so deeply, but I’m still choosing gratitude for all the lord has blessed me with in my borrowed breath of life. To be healthy and alive today is a blessing in itself. I would really appreciate prayers for my squad and all the other squads going home as we enter into a time of abrupt changes and heartache. Please be praying for the world as well, we need hope and we need healing, and what better savior to turn to than Jesus, the healer and source of salvation. Thank you for reading this today and for supporting my entire journey, it’s been incredible, and I am so thankful for my race. It isn’t over yet, it just looks a little different than I thought it would. You are loved and held by the God of the universe, cling and hold to that truth in these scary times.
Til next time,
Mallory
