The room was still; the women were silent. Smiling, they tentatively watched us as they wondered who we were and why we were with them. Sitting in the safe home for abused and endangered women, we smiled back as we thought about the words of encouragement to give to these ladies who have experienced so much- so much pain, so much turmoil, so much hopelessness.
In Guatemala City, my team visited a refuge for women who, without a hope, were desperately looking for love and a glimpse of redemption. We shared stories from our lives, we talked to them about God’s love, and I shared the story of the bleeding woman in Matthew 9:18-26:
I talked about how, amidst all of our muck, mire, and desperation, Jesus SEES us. When the bleeding woman approached Him, without confidence and in pure despair, “Jesus turned and SAW her” (v.22). When He sees her, He does not dismiss her nor does He scoff at her pain; He rather says, “Take heart, daughter” (v.22). He gives her a sense of belonging, a source of emotional healing. Then, He heals her physically and restores her body after handling her heart. I talked about how God does the same with us- we can go to Him in our broken states, and He will always see us, respond to us, and call us “son” or “daughter.” We do not have to be “put together” to call upon our Lord. He only desires that we come to Him with our pains and hurts so that He can provide healing for our hearts and bring us closer to Him.
After we prayed with the women, we asked the ladies if they wanted to share some of their stories. One older lady started to share and gestured to her 14-year-old daughter beside her, who was holding a 10-day-old baby. She began to tell the story of how her husband had abused her daughter for a long while, eventually getting her pregnant. The mother had not known about the ongoing abuse, and she began to cry upon recounting the pain that her daughter had endured. The 10-day old-baby was the son of the 14-year-old girl and her own father, and it was heart-wrenching to think of how much this family had experienced- I cannot even imagine the impact the abuse would have on the relationship of the girl and her mother, the psychological state of both women, and the harbored feelings of shame, unworthiness, jealousy, hatred, and bitterness amidst all involved.
As my heart was breaking and I was thinking about how to cope with this devastating information, another girl in the room began to share about her countless experiences of rape. Starting when she was a young girl, she was raped by family members. When she left her hometown for freedom and a respite, she was raped at a new job. Then, she was abducted by a gang and held hostage for days on end as they used her for their personal pleasure. She had an abortion when she became pregnant by a man who claimed to love her, and others raped her numerous other times as she began to believe the lie that she was worthless and only existed for the use and abuse by others.
I could barely hold back the tears as I tried to put myself in their shoes. There was no way I could wrap my head around the hardships these beautiful women had withstood. I suddenly felt the urging from God to do something for them. I was at the time wearing 3 rings: two I had been wearing since day one of the Race and one I had received as a gift from a girl in India. The two from the states were from my mom and my friend Eva, and after being prompted in my heart by God, I decided to give those two rings to the mother and daughter from the first story. I told the 14-year old girl that I was giving her a ring from my mother, the best mother in the whole world, because I knew that she was going to be an excellent mom and I knew that God would bless her and always love her. I gave the ring from Eva to the mother of the 14-year-old, telling her that the ring was from a very special friend at home, and she should always know that she is very extraordinary, not forgettable, and very loved. Finally, I gave the beautiful red ring from India to the woman from the second story (with a harsh history of rape and abuse), telling her that I felt like a princess when I wore that ring, and every time she wears it, she has to remember that she is a princess. I made her promise me that she would always bring to mind that she is important, she is worthy, and that the King of Kings loves her.
I came on the Race thinking I would wear those rings until the end of the 11 months, but I cannot honestly think of better people to receive them. The rings were very special for me, and it was a blessing to demonstrate (in a small way) to these women how special they truly are. It was very uplifting to see the ladies so cared for in the Christian home, but it was saddening to see how much their hearts still needed to mend. The world does not see them, the world does not honor them, and the world does not care. BUT, God sees them in their desperation, He calls them DAUGHTERS, and He loves them as worthy princesses in His almighty kingdom.
