As I prayed for another night of bar ministry on Tuesday, I asked God to give me visions and words… to clearly point me to the people and places he would have me go for the night. For the 3rd or 4th time over the course of the week, I got a picture of me sitting at the bar and talking to a white man in a bar called Sunshine Bar.
[ I have been to this bar a couple of times during day outreach, and it has been very busy; the number of white men coming in and out with women was shocking for a Tuesday or Thursday afternoon. My teammates and I have also been very aware of the men in there watching us closely and suspiciously (as we harmlessly sip our diet cokes and play pool.) The owner is the one who watches us like a hawk– he has been on my heart a lot, but I have sensed a lot of spiritual darkness around him. The way he looks at us and the way I see him in my prayers has made me a little fearful and cautious. So, I wanted to be very discerning about this vision God was giving me… Was he asking me to initiate a conversation with the owner? Was he asking me to go there on that very night, or should I wait until the next day and go during day outreach? I wanted to follow the spirit's leading, but I didn't want to put myself in harm's way.]
So, we went out for ministry Tuesday night, and as my teammate Rachel and I walked to the bars I prayed for us. I asked the Holy Spirit to guide us clearly, to speak and move through us, and to keep us safe. We began the night at a bar where we had befriended the bar lady, but we didn't feel very welcome there so we didn't stay long. We went next door to the 7/11 to get a snack, I sparked a conversation with an elderly man at the checkout, and he said "God bless you" as he walked out onto Loi Kroh Road (we found this a little strange, but nothing here shocks us anymore.) I told Rachel about my vision, and she suggested we go to Sunshine Bar and just feel it out/ maybe order a drink and just pray at the bar. So, we walked in and sat down at the bar (the bar was empty except for 2 employees and 2 men). After a moment, the 2 men walked outside in discussion & only one of them returned. After a moment, I realized that the man standing beside me was the same man I just met 5 minutes earlier in the 7/11. I knew God was moving, and I knew this was the man from my vision. It was not difficult to spark a conversation– he recognized us immediately, and he was obviously lonely and looking for someone to talk to. So, this is Solly's story:
Solly is in his 60's, and he's originally from Israel but lives in Florida. One year ago, his wife and daughter died in a car accident. He immediately went to Bangkok, where he grieved with women and alcohol. He returned to the States, but hasn't been able to find a woman (that meets his standards) to love him unconditionally. He is a retired airline pilot, so he can fly all over the world for free, making it possible for him to travel as much as he likes in his retirement. He is here for an undetermined amount of time; he said if he finds a good woman he will stay longer. He has psoriasis and is very self-concious about his skin; he made the comment that many women he's been with have looked at him like a leopor, which has caused him much hurt and insecurity. He has a friend who came to Chiang Mai and met a "good Thai lady" to bring back to the States with him; he decided he would do the same. I listened as Solly shared his story, his Jewish beliefs, and his desperate desire to be loved. God opened doors for me to share about my belief in Jesus, as well as my hope that Solly could find a good woman in the States who would love him for his heart & not for his wallet. I felt so blessed to be God's vessel; I had the opportunity to be the one God spoke through to his son Solly who he loves dearly. I followed the Spirit's leading and God blessed that obedience. It's amazing what God will do when we take the time to seek & listen. By then end of our conversation, Solly said he would try praying to Jesus (and see if he could believe that He is God.) I told Solly that if he would just be willing to seek Him, he would surely find Him. He agreed to try, praise God.
The following morning, as I was jogging past street vendors and restaurants near our neighborhood, I noticed two men sitting at a cafe table drinking coffee. It finally registered that one of the men was Solly; he recognized me too and asked me to join them for a cup of coffee. I was hoping to expand on my conversation with Solly from the night before, but his friend was the rant-&-raving type who controlled the conversation for the next hour. Solly and I both sat and listened (and I prayed silently the entire time) as this lost soul shared his beliefs on women, sex, and Thai culture. This 68-year-old [Danny] has been here in Chiang Mai for six years now, "sleeping with 70-80 women without having to pay them". Danny admitted that he had no interest in meeting a woman his own age, that he likes 20-30 year olds (to keep him young), and he even jokingly called himself a pedophile. I had to fight back disgust and my desire to "put him in his place" as he went on and on. He had some points that made me ponder about the "purchasing of women" in Thailand and how it has many similarities to the many material-based relationships all over the world. Here, men may spend 300 baht ($10) to take a woman out and end up in bed with her; in America, a man may buy diamonds, nice cars, or expensive dinners to get a much younger, more attractive woman into bed. There's a whole slew of tv shows on American television about the gold-diggers out there; many couples today consist of rich old men and young blond bombshells/ "trophey wives" & many of them did not marry for true love or seek God in their union (I'm not speaking for every one of these couples, but it is a reality for many). While I'm not AT ALL justifying or agreeing with the terrible things taking place here in Thailand and all over the world, he did make me think.
Many girls all over the world go out to the bars, have a guy buy them a few drinks, and go home with a complete stranger (this is the sad but true reality of college life today). The similarities that I see here in Thailand and back in the States are frightening. Many women who are "lonely or looking" go out on nice dinner dates, and either out of obligation or otherwise sleep with the man. With the influence of advertisements, alcohol, and just plain worldliness, we've gotten so lost and so far from God. We're looking for love in all the wrong places: sex, alcohol & drugs, materialism, pornography, etc. I have spent much of my life seeking for something to fill me up or make me feel loved/ happy/ complete, feeling like there's just "something missing." We're all looking for love, but God is the only one who can fill the gaps in our hearts through Christ… and I pray for myself and this world (Solly & Danny included) that we can look upwards to God and not outwards to the world for this "filling".
The most amazing reality in my life today is this: no matter what we've done in our past or the things that we've used to replace our longing for Jesus and no matter how unworthy or dirty we feel, we are pure and redeemed by the blood of Christ. All we are asked to do is repent and seek God with our whole hearts. What a blessing to be loved by the Creator of the universe & to have him living inside of us so we can share that love with others… it is the ultimate love. I feel blessed to have been given God's eyes for these men, to be able to love them and pray for their brokeness. Please join me in praying for the many women & men here in Chiang Mai who are just seeking God's love and don't even know it.
