The other day I was sitting in my English class and we were reading the great {well if you like to read stuff that is impossible to understand} Shakespearian play Macbeth out loud as a class. My class had all of our desks in a huge circle so we could all see each other and listen to our classmates read the play. We had finally reached Act V, the last one in the play, and I had been successful in not having to “play” {just read that characters lines} anyone. But of course I got assigned the last character in the last scene of Act V. So I had a little pitty party for myself because I was so close to getting by without doing anything.
We began reading and I didn’t really have a clue as to what was going on in Macbeth because like for real that stuff is way over my head. So I decided to look over my lines to make sure that I could pronounce all of the words and not look like a dingus. To some of you this may sound very silly, but it’s not silly to me. I literally had two lines and one of them had a curse word in it. TWO LINES. There’s like 932742752 lines in Macbeth and low and behold my line had to be graced with the presence of a potty word {yes I just called it that, make fun if you wish}.
So my turn to speak finally came up and I began to read my line. When I got to the word that I was uncomfortable with saying I stopped for a split second and quickly spit out the alternative word instead. There were little giggles amongst my peers but the class remained pretty silent. I’m pretty sure everyone in the room was like this girl is 17 years old and she’s too scared to cuss. My teacher proceeded to stop the reading and explain to us what was happening in this scene. She told me that in the context, the word was not being used as a curse word. She asked me if I would read them out of the Bible, and I said yes of course. But Macbeth is not the Bible and even if it is written out in front of me and the language isn’t even from my heart I still chose not to say it.
I strive to keep my heart pure, and one thing that I believe is crucial for me to be successful in this is keeping my words clean. I get it, saying a curse word in class isn’t that big of a deal to some people and God wouldn’t shun me or anything. But to me this small act is a big deal. Cussing {and not just cussing- gossip & perverted language as well} is so tempting in this world and is so prevalent. I feel that if I say a bad word {I feel so childish for calling them that but you get the point} once, then I won’t have as much of a problem saying it again in the future. I don’t want to get comfortable with having foul words in my mind even if the word isn’t my own.
What happened to me in class last week is probably something that I should have forgotten the second that I walked out the door, but honestly it has been on my mind on and off ever since and hast really been on my heart. Not just the foul language, but gossip and everything else. We aren’t supposed to be of the world {Romans 12:2} and I believe that cursing is of this world so I have decided to refrain. And as a teenage girl gossip is a huge temptation and I have to ask God for strength every day. But it is only by the strength of God that I can ever be successful and when I mess up he surrounds me with his never-ending grace. I didn’t write this blog to talk about how I think cussing is bad. I mean if that floats your boat, go right ahead. And you don’t have to stop speaking that way when me and my “little ears” {as some people like to call them….} are around. I don’t care if you do and I still love you for you and thats that. I don’t curse because I constantly want to be focused on our sweet king Jesus, and bad words distract me from him.
{“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.” Psalm 19:14}
