Before we start, can I just tell you how incredibly hard it is to blog? There is so much pressure to be interesting, my goodness. Okay, I’m trying my best, so hang with me, I promise I’ll be more interesting when we’re actually on the race and I’m doing cooler things than just asking people for money.
Speaking of asking people for money, (see what I did there? Great segway, Mak) it is a lot harder than I thought … I go to a public high school (well, went I graduated 2 weeks ago) and trying to explain to unbelievers what I’m doing is a little difficult. “You’re going to work in underdeveloped countries, and you have to pay how much??” “You’re not being paid to work? You’re paying them?” But the response I keep getting is, “Wow, that’s expensive.” And my response is always, well yeah it is “expensive” but I’ve never thought of missions as expensive. $17,000 on paper is a lot of money. $17,000 anywhere is a lot of money, but in the grand scheme of the Kingdom, is it? The enemy continually wants me to think it’s “expensive,” because that’s where the fear sets in, and fear doesn’t come from The Father. I have spent my whole life living in fear. My family makes this joke that Fear, from the Disney movie, “Inside Out” is my spirit animal. I can be jumpy, I don’t step out of my comfort zone, and I avoid confrontation at all costs. I’ve dealt with anxiety and I know first hand it can control everything you do. We decided this week that our squad name was going to be “The Warriors,” 40+ teenagers kicking butt for the Kingdom. Pretty cool right? For my anxious soul, the name can be intimidating. How can I, someone who is scared of everything, become a warrior for the Kingdom of Heaven? I know, by now you are probably like “Why the heck is she backpacking for 9 months??” Trust me, I have no idea. My only response can be that the Lord is changing me and making me into this new person who signs up for 9 months of missions, and cuts off all her hair, (I’ve had really long hair my whole life, and I cut it to my shoulders last week. I’ve only cried about it once.) So as the stress of fundraising settles in I remind myself that while it is expensive, the reward will be so much greater. God has done so much already, and I am so thankful!! If you have donated already thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!!!! It’s so encouraging to watch people who I barely know, people I don’t know, people I’ve known my whole life, friends, family, classmates, friends of classmates so many people being so generous and kind. It’s kind of exciting. Okay, it’s really exciting. I’m seeing God move and I know He will continue to move. And He will move in His own divine timing. I think when I started this journey I just wanted someone to write me a $17,000 check, and while that would be amazing, instead I have the opportunity to have so many people a part of my story. (Side note, if you feel led to give me a $17,000 check, disregard everything I just said.) I am continuing to ask God to make me a Warrior and not a worrier, and maybe you should too. In what ways are you letting fear control your everyday life? And how is that getting in the way of what God wants to use you for in his master battle plan? This is a war and we are winning, but not without a cost. So let’s pick up our swords and fight. It’s life and death we’re talking about here, and that is why I’m so passionate about this trip. God is on the move, so let’s be a part of it.
“If the wind goes where you send it, so will I…”
