Okay, so I am going to do something risky and blog about PVT. Now that I’ve met a good portion of the parents in person, this is even more daunting. I know you all actually read these. I am going to preface this post with this: Every single racer absolutely loved having their parents with them in Swazi, and every single racer’s experiences and lessons were different. These are simply MY take-aways from the few days of PVT.
Many of us, myself included, found that after spending time with our parents we were confused why we were still struggling to have patience and grace toward them. I mean, we’ve been working on theses things for 9, going on 10, months! We should have these things down by now, right? And fill-in-the-blank thing doesn’t bother me when my squad mates do it, so why does it still hit a nerve when me parent does it? When I was talking with my team about it last night, the Lord gave me this analogy.
We have been spending nine months learning how to use tools. We have been learning how to swing our spiritual axes, chipping away at ourselves and those around us. We are getting pretty good! But we’ve been chipping on the same tree(s) for a while, and we can see the marks we’ve made, the progress we’ve achieved. But when the parents momentarily step into the picture, they are a new tree. Now let me take a minute to define ‘new’. New in our lives…absolutely not, Praise the Lord! But they are new to the environment of the tools we’ve been training with. Up until this point we’ve been clipping, trimming and pruning bits and pieces here and there, and in some cases pretty substantial limbs. PVT was the first swing at some new trees – older trees with more bark, more vines, more complex relationships that we have not had to tackle yet on the race. So it is no wonder that when we got back with our parents for a hot second, we were taken a little by surprise when the axe swinging we had become accustom to suddenly didn’t hit quite like we were expecting. If you’ve ever swung an axe, hatchet, or your choice of wood cutting weaponry, you will know that if you get a weird angle, sometimes the impact will sting you a little bit. The force of collision will rebound and send back shocks that are uncomfortable. You feel ungraceful and awkward and you probably have to shake your hand out for a minute.
As racers we realized, hang on, we are going to have to start swinging anew when we get home. We are going to have to start on the bark again. We’ve got new trees in our “forest of community”. Even though we know our parents have been keeping up with us, we know they care about our experiences and our growth, it does not mean that they understand the depth of community in which we have been living. It does not mean that they are going to know the “right” questions to ask. AND THAT’S OKAY. PARENTS, We are not expecting you to pick up where our squad has left off when we get home. So please, don’t put that on yourself. Please have grace with us when we ask you weirdly deep questions that you don’t really know how to answer or that seem too personal for us to be asking of you. It’s just habit. But likewise, please don’t expect us to stop swinging. We’ll all adjust. Just as you get into a rhythm when you chop wood, we will find a new rhythm to refining our relationships for the glory of God.
So if you’re a future racer, or a current racer wondering if you should invite your parents to PVT, first, PLEASE PLEASE don’t read any more blogs. Pray about it. Really. The Lord will tell you. But, second, PVT does give you a good idea about what going home is going to feel like. There might be some big thing(s) you want to tackle with your parents. PVT may or may not be the place and time to do that. If you’re worried if you’ll have time, you will. But you’re going to have to choose and create those conversations. They aren’t going to happen on their own and it is harder than it sounds.
All in all, PVT was absolutely worth it. I would do it again in heart beat. If nothing else they feed you really well #bonus
Thank you to all the parents who made some incredible sacrifices to come. Thank you for your openness, your willingness to participate, your vulnerability, your encouragement and your fellowship. Our squad is pretty incredible and now I understand a little better why, you ALL are freaking rockstars who love deeply, fiercely and unconditionally. Thank you for your never ending support and love.
