May 22nd, 2019
Earlier this month as we were sitting down as a team asking the Lord what he had for us this month we heard the Lord telling us to go camping. So we finally did!
Back track a little though… my initial response to going camping of course was “Yes, 100% I’m in!” But as time went on and the balance in my bank account became smaller, my yes soon became a no. BUT THEN one of my teammates Katie decided to fundraise on behalf of all of us for this camping trip. All she did was post on facebook that we were going camping and that she was in need for $75, and within 5 minutes someone sent her the money! Wow so cool! God provides.
What blows my mind just as much is that God made a way for my initial yes to camping. All along he was going to make it happen. This completely affirmed that my circumstances can’t limit what God wants to do. Nothing can get in the way of the things I say yes to if its in God’s will.
So we packed up our big packs with 1 and a half days worth of clothes and food, our tents, sleeping pads, sleeping bags, and toiletries and drove about an hour away to Selangor State Park.
We got there around 11am, and set up camp and sat down for lunch by the river by noon. And ah man did my soul need this time just immersed in the wilderness. We ate lunch and hiked around a bit, walked or swam in the river, played games in Jordan’s tent as a thunderstorm rolled over us, ate dinner, chilled, and then settled down to sleep by about 8pm.
A classic day of camping.
The next morning we all took time to ourselves reading our bibles and journaling in our tents, until they turned into saunas. And I decided to go on a run.
I heard God tell me to leave the headphones behind. So I ran on the path we hiked on yesterday that was only about a mile loop to the end of it & back to our campsite, so once I got to the end of it I ended up going back and forth between checkpoints I created. The whole time I felt like I was listening to the directions God was telling me to go, back and forth between this bridge and the end of the path over and over, as if he was asking me “what about one more time?”, and I would listen, run forward then clearly hear him say, “now go back to the bridge and do it again, how about one more time, and then go all the way back”, and I would listen, yes sometimes I resisted, but as I took one step in the wrong direction I turned back and he again just gently redirected me.
At some point as I was running I was suddenly overwhelmed with the feeling of being home, and I know its because running trails in the forest is one of my favorite things to do and favorite places to be to clear my head. I felt at home for a split moment, this new wilderness even across the world felt so familiar. It was like I was hit with one of those “aha!” or “oh duh!” moments when I thought to myself “I’m running in the jungle/forest of Malaysia, how the heck did I get here?!”
God brought me here to the jungle of Malaysia for a reason. Doing things I do at home, like running trails in a forest, bring up many familiar feelings. In that moment I caught myself forgetting that even though this wilderness is a completely different wilderness by location its still the wilderness.
The wilderness is a place all over the Bible that people experience trials and hardships within. And for me the wilderness is always the place I go to run as I experience hard stuff in my life.
The wilderness here is the same as the wilderness at home in a spiritual & metaphorical way. I’m here in Kuala Lumpar, Malaysia still in the wilderness, still going through hard things, but still running with God to find peace in the storms of life just like I was at home.
We actually experienced that quite literally our first afternoon, the whole finding peace in the midst of the storm thing. We sat in Jordan’s tent played games, played music, sang songs, and just hungout as a thunderstorm rolled over us. That little tent was peace in the midst of the storm. We were just chillen while the skies around us were all kinds of crazy. Yup, just like Jesus, the one just chillen in the boat asleep when the storm is wild.
The wilderness, ah man, it always reconnects me to God and to myself. It always reminds me how much I need God, how small I am, and how much of a gift it is that I get to be exactly where I’m at, even in the midst of the storms (literally and figuratively).
The wilderness is hard, really freaking hard sometimes, but its also so full of peace, and a place where God speaks so clearly.
Just like God spoke so clearly to our new friend Issah (ee-suh). A woman we met as we were waiting for our taxi to come pick us up, which by the way was a struggle to find, fun fact most grabs don’t want to pick you up an hour away from the city. But God of course was right on time with it all.
Issah (whose name I know I’m butchering the spelling on) is a woman who shared with us her story. She was a single mother to 4 kids that happened to be around our ages, and she shared with us how as her husband left he put on them some sort of black magic. She shared with us her struggles with needing healing over her bones, muscles, and colon, and how she has sought out healing waters nearby in hope of being cured but wanted to go back to see if maybe it would work again. She shared with us how people have viewed her as insane for saying no to men asking her to sleep with her because she was a single mother. She said she was a fighter against these requests, and after even being with her for a short time I believe it! She shared with us that she paints murals at the park for charity, and her compassion for just doing the right things and choosing kindness.
This woman was incredible and so so kind. And it was a gift to have this beautiful encounter with her, pray healing over her and her children, cast out the power of whatever evil her ex-husband tried to place upon her family in Jesus name, share the gospel within our prayer, and just tell this woman how much God saw her and loves her. I believe she will be healed, after we prayed she even said “I feel different!”, Praise God! Issah was a woman of faith whether she knew it or not.
God used us. God used me in my wilderness, a broken human going through refinement and hardship to tell a daughter of his how loved she is. He used our hands to heal, and the power of the name of Jesus coming out of our mouthes to break and curses placed on her family.
All we were was a few girls just in the wilderness waiting for their taxi, and God sent us someone to love on, someone to heal.
How wild is that?!
To me, this was like God repeating to me what he spoke to me on my run, “what about one more time?”
Will you make yourself available to my Holy Spirit moving in you one more time? Will you bring peace to the storm of this woman’s life? Will you listen to me in the wilderness, listen to my voice over any thoughts in your head swirling around about the hard stuff you’re experiencing? Will you listen, and surrender your needs and worries to me and watch my Kingdom come here, once more?
I hope and pray that my answer to all of those questions is always a resounding yes. That’s my prayer for the race and for the rest of my life.
And that’s what I learned in the wilderness these past two days.
The wilderness is familiar and sometimes hard, but even in the wilderness God invites me into experiencing the miraculous if I answer his question “will you, once more?” with a yes.
I want my yes to remain a yes, and I know now that God will always make a way for my yes despite my circumstances or feelings.
No matter what, the wilderness is good. And yes it becomes familiar the longer you spend time in it, but each time it speaks so clearly, specifically, and differently to me. And without fail it brings us closer to people we choose to adventure with and brings new people to us we were meant to cross paths with.
Fundrasing update: $2500 to go! Please pray about considering donating! God also told me to start fundraising for personal money too, for adventures, to love my team well, for coffee shops to connect to Wifi, etc.! So donating via venmo (@mrieds) would be amazing as well! 🙂
Thank you all for your support and for reading, you have no idea how much it means to me, I AM THANKFUL FOR YOU! 🙂
