So to start off, I don’t want you to get your hopes up. I will not be back in good old Colorado for Christmas, as much as I am longing for some snow and mountains.
Instead, I will be spending Christmas with 22 other beautiful girls, in Manila.
Yes, I know, Manila is not where we are supposed to be. We are supposed to be with our little Lighthouse family in Tacloban, but during debrief, when we tried to get bus tickets, we found out that they were all sold out for about a week. So we desperately tried to find a place to stay here in Manila. We asked the other branch of KIM if they had room for us to stay at their place and, low and behold, they had exactly 23 beds in one room for us girls
So that is how we ended up here. In Manila. On Christmas.
Now, I have been feeling a little displaced. Not only will I not be home home for Christmas, but I will also not be home for Christmas, in Tacloban. But I am choosing to believe that God wanted us to be here for a reason.
And every day that we have been here, he has continued to give little affirmations as to why we are here. Yesterday, we got to help people move out and it was such a blessing! Then, today, we got to hang out with some other people from our squad for a little when they brought their ministry boys to come swimming in the pool (yes, we have a pool, and yes I will be swimming it in on Christmas day.) And we also learned today that there is a pretty large typhoon rolling into the Philippines as we speak. On top of that, I have been sick, as well as a good amount of the girls, for the past week or so, and so we get this time to recover before taking the 30-hour bus ride back to Tacloban.
Many people have been asking me how I am doing, if I miss home, and even if I will be home for Christmas. Lemme just share my heart:
I am doing pretty well! Other than a bad cough and stuffy nose, I am healthy and happy! I love the people I am with and I couldn’t ask to spend my Christmas away from home with anyone else. Yes, I miss home so much. I miss my sweet family, my amazing friends, and my fluffy kitties. I miss the snow, I miss the real Christmas tree with all of our random decorations on it. I miss snuggling, I miss waking up to mom’s cooking. I miss my cozy bed and warm showers.
And yes I will be home for Christmas… if only in my dreamsssss (sorry had to). But really. Just because I am not physically present does not mean that I am not there at all. Like for instance, yesterday, I found out that my family didn’t get a Christmas tree. (I am usually the one who leads the whole Christmas decorating and tree hunting process when I am home.) So I jumped on that one and now, guess what? They got a tree the next night. And it looks so so nice. I also made sure that mom decorated. It’s the little things people.
God has also been placing little reminders of home all around for me. Just a few examples: Right now, there is some serious metal rock playing somewhere very loudly, which reminds me of my sweet dad. Then, I just got my toes painted red, which one, reminds me of my nana, and also of my mom, tia, and sweet cousin Gracyn because we always used to get our toes painted for special occasions. I am eating cough drops which reminds me of my grandma. And many other little reminders of my sweet family and friends that keep popping up everywhere.
Now, Christmas was a hard day. I missed all of the traditions and the family jokes and the food. But I know that ultimately, I am giving all of that up, for such a great gain.
And I will be home for Christmas, just not this year. This year, I got to rest in the comfort of my heavenly father’s arms. And it felt just like home.
I love you all so so much and know that I am thinking of you thing Christmas (and always.) I love getting messages from people, and if you ever need or want to talk, please reach out!!! I miss you all and I wish you a Merry Christmas.
Xoxo,
M
