2 weeks. I arrive back in the States. In a matter of days, we will finish ministry with CRU and head to final debrief. Final debrief. We will come together to celebrate the year, the work of the Lord, and the new life that has come with trusting and following him into these past eleven months. I’m sure this time will not come without many tears on my end. 

This year has meant the world to me. To step back from school and career and walk into this journey with trust in the Lord has brought such freedom and healing. I’ve experienced so many new cultures, met fellow believers around the world, seen lives changed in coming to Christ, and been apart of the Global Church at work in bringing Kingdom here and now on Earth. 

I’ve learned to live my life with an eternal perspective with open arms of surrender to the Lord’s leading. I’ve learned I can hear the Lord’s voice. I’ve experienced deeper intimacy with Him in so many new ways. I stepped out of depression, unforgiveness, and negative self image and exchanged it for life, freedom, light, truth, and joy. I am loved- I have learned to step into this identity- the identity He has given me of being loved and to operate out of this. Not operating out of a performance mindset seeking to be loved.

I’ve recognized my passion of being a worshipper. I love worship! It brings me life, renewal, and realigns my heart with the truth. I can’t help it; I’ve been created to worship the Lord and connect to Him through music. To sing out who He is and who He created me to be. I’ve learned to dance freely with the Holy Spirit, the helper He has given to adventure through this life with. I’ve worshipped through being intentional with gratitude and thankfulness. I want my life to sing praises to the Lord in all that comes. Today I raise a hallelujah through some of the songs that have been close to my heart this year. 

As I enter back into the States soon, it is bittersweet. I feel so many emotions and have so many thoughts. I don’t know what this next season in transitioning back will look like, but I know the One who does know – the One that will walk with me each day, each moment.

 

I raise a hallelujah, fear you lost your hold on me!

I’m gonna sing, in the middle of the storm

Louder and louder, you’re gonna hear my praises roar

Up from the ashes, hope will arise

Death is defeated, the King is alive!

Sing a little louder (In the presence of my enemies)

Sing a little louder (Louder than the unbelief)

Sing a little louder (My weapon is a melody)

Sing a little louder (Heaven comes to fight for me)

 

Hallelujah, ‘Cause once I was broken

But You loved my whole heart through

Sin has no hold on me

‘Cause Your grace holds me now

Healed and forgiven

Look where my chains are now

Death has no hold on me

‘Cause Your grace holds that ground

 

Hallelujah, One name is higher,

One name is stronger.

Than any grave, than any throne,

Christ exalted over all.

The only Saviour, Jesus Messiah.

To You alone our praise belongs,

Christ exalted over all.

 

Hallelujah, I know that I need You

I I know that I need You

I run to the Father

I fall into grace

I’m done with the hiding

No reason to wait

My heart needs a surgeon

My soul needs a friend

So I’ll run to the Father

Again and again

And again and again

 

Hallelujah, I could let You down over and over

But Your love never changes

Lord, You’re so patient

And if I run back home

God, You come running

Your love never changes

Lord, You’re so gracious

With a kiss

With a ring and a robe

You have found me

You have found me…

And it feels like coming home for the first time in a long time

It feels like coming home

 

Hallelujah, Jesus, my Jesus

It’s extravagant, it doesn’t make sense

We’ll never comprehend, the way You love us

It’s unthinkable, only heaven knows

Just how far You’d go, to say You love us

 

Hallelujah, There is no disappointment in Your eyes

There is no shame there is only pride

I am loved

Father, I’m loved by You

There is no distance in Your embrace

Over and over again You say

I am loved

Father, I’m loved by You

 

Hallelujah, No, I won’t waste another day

Believing words You didn’t say. 

You don’t make mistakes

And You didn’t start with me

Even though I’m far from where I know I’m supposed to be

You don’t make mistakes

And heaven would agree

That in Your eyes I’m everything that I was made to be

   

YouTube Video Links:

Raise a Hallelujah by Bethel Music 

Whole Heart by Hillsong UNITED

Exalted Over All by Vertical Worship 

Run to the Father by Cody Carnes 

Coming Home by Housefires

Extravagant by Bethel Music 

I am Loved by Mack Brock

Mistakes by Influence Music