Where Feet May Fail
“And there I find You in the mystery. In oceans deep, my faith will stand”
– Oceans, Hillsong United
Last December, God showed me a picture of myself waist deep in the ocean. The waves were calm, and I could not see the shore. I only saw deep blue water in each direction that I looked. There were no people in sight, but about five feet in front of me stood a figure of a man motioning me toward him. Jesus. It was Him. The one that has saved my soul. While I could not make out His face, I knew it was Him there in front of me.
As I began to walk toward Him, the water continued to deepen. As I walked further, I felt a resistance from the waves. It was as if the deeper I walked, the water began to strip me of things that I had held onto for so long. I looked to my right and saw the word pride wash away. I looked left and saw names of people who had hurt me float away. Rejection, relationships, future plans, fear. I realized that as I began to walk deeper into the water toward Jesus, the more things began to fall off of me.
This was the most beautiful thing that God had ever given me… until May of this year.
Again, God showed me the same picture – me in the deep blue water, Jesus in front of me. This time was different though. Instead of being in front of me in the water, Jesus was standing on top of the water, reaching for me.
Standing still and waist-deep in the water, I was holding ropes in my right hand and with my left hand I was reaching toward Jesus. Each of the ropes in my hand was attached to life buoys, the orange and white kind. Each buoy held the things that had previously washed away. Pride, rejection, relationships, fear, future plans. At some point since December, I had thrown those buoys to rescue the things that had washed out to sea. I had reached for them as they washed away because I was unsure of how to let them go. Without them, maybe I thought I would drown in the unknown.
Let them go, and come walk with me Madie.
Jesus, we are doing fine in the water… we’re good here. See? I have my buoys in case I can’t touch the ground.
It’s time to let go of those things that you think are keeping you afloat. It’s time to get out of the water and walk on it.
My season of cleansing had come to an end. Jesus washed me white as snow, yet I still thought I needed a safety net that had been knit together by emotional insecurity, past relationships, and who the world said I was.
Let go.
Hesitantly, I obeyed.
Once I opened my right hand, the buoys floated free. Instantly, Jesus replaced the things I once clenched so tightly with His own hand, and there I was. Where feet may fail, walking on the waves with Christ.
Before, I was comfortable wading in the ocean with Jesus. I knew Him, I loved Him, and I boxed Him in. I let Him have some of me, but I held on to the things that I thought were comfortable. In reality, those things were heavy and toxic. Those things prevented me from walking on the waves. Since May, my own feet have failed many times, but the gracious hands of God have not. He holds me up when I stumble and He loves me when I falter.
This first two weeks of the World Race have been more challenging than I could have imagined. Past insecurities, fears, and emotions have surfaced. Thankfully I have a Heavenly Father who knows me and allows me to place these things at His feet, which never fail. He speaks truth over me, He tells me who I am in Him, and He reminds me that He has nothing but perfect love for me.
This same Father has nothing but love for you. If I can give you any encouragement, it’s this – walking out of my comfort zone and into my calling has been the most incredible journey. It has been challenging, but it’s a relief knowing that I never have to walk alone.
