Every once in a while I stop and look around.
I stop and I see paved streets, small homes, and sunlight breaking through mountain trees.
I stop and find myself surrounded by sisters, hands laid on my shoulders, and soft whispers to Jesus.
I stop and realize I’m standing in a kitchen, arms wrapped around a family missing a father for Christmas.
I breathe in cold air on the lawn of our base, a deck of cards and real talk in front of me, and a blanket around my neck.
I wipe a drop off my face, arms sore from reaching to the top of the school walls with a brush of white paint.
I sit on a rooftop pile of wood, volcanoes in the background, homes, churches, and tiendas in the foreground.
And I think to myself, I’m just here.
It wasn’t my money that put me on a plane, it wasn’t my request that placed me on this team, and it wasn’t my car that drove me into Chimaltenango, Guatemala.
I think to God, ‘Here I am.’
I am enveloped in his creation, I am taking the steps he has planned, I am speaking the words of truth he has given me.
And I’m just here. I’m 100% here for it.
I think about the decisions I did make.
I decided to put off college, I chose to listen to what God had for me, I wanted to be here.
I think about all the other places that I could be right now, and yet here I am.
I could be at college, I could be working, I could be home for break, I could be in Swaziland on my original route.
And yet, here I am.
The Lord brings me perspective in these moments.
The Lord shows me my role of worship, to give him thanks that I am here.
The Lord guides my steps and he knew I would be here.
He reminds that I am just here, I’m here to be a part of his work.
He says, join me! Just be present.
He says, all I need from you is for you to be here.
He wants me, just as he wants each of his children, and he wants me here.
His grace reminds me how small I am, that even when I mess up or I’m not here, his love doesn’t stop.
His joy reminds me how grateful I am, that he would place me here knowing it’s exactly what I want and need.
His glory reminds me how humble I should be, that I’m here but it will never be about me.
The gospel started with God. It didn’t start with I, and it didn’t start with me.
But here I am. A vessel, a messenger, a disciple filled with the Spirit.
The gospel brings freedom and an invitation to love God and love others, and I’m here for it.
As I am writing to you I remember that you are not here. And again I remind you that the gospel is not just for me. Just because I am here, does not discredit the fact that you are there. You have the same freedom and invitation. You are capable of stopping, looking around, and praising God for letting you join the work he’s already doing.
Psalm 103: 20-22
Praise the Lord, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
Praise the Lord, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
Praise the Lord, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the Lord, O my soul.
