Yesterday, I was baptized and it truly was the best day of my life. I got it.
At a young age I accepted Christ simply out of belief at a VBS, but then received no discipling or understanding of what living as a Christian meant. Later, I was hurt deeply by people not liking me. But I realize now it was Christ in me who was not liked. Yet, in that pain, I accepted the lie that I was unlovable and not enough. I wore it for my whole life.
A year in a half ago was the first time I began to see how hurt I had been and all the pain I carried from those lies. I knew the gospel, but not for myself or in my heart. I loved Jesus because I knew it was the right thing to do, not because I needed Him. I was so numb, hurt, and prideful I didn’t even see the love I was being given freely. I couldn’t even love myself.
While working through my own wounding and story the love of Jesus began to bring life and fruit to my life. I began to see how part of my walk was based in the law. I began to see how much I needed Jesus.
You see, the law is death. It is why God gave us a new covenant: grace. He knew we could not sustain in the law. We would always fall short. So, God sent His son for us to bear the weight of all our sin. Jesus died and went to hell for us so we could be wiped clean and forgiven. Then, when Jesus rose and ascended into Heaven we were given the Spirit and more.
All of God’s goodness and promise lives in our hearts if you have been born again and believe in Jesus. God has already given the gift to everyone; it is just up to us to receive it.
Therefore, I got baptized yesterday in the freezing Tara River because this revelation of the Gospel finally reached my heart. I realized with all of me that I need Jesus, I am loved because of what He did, I am forgiven because of what He did, and I am free from the law because of what He did.
In that water died legalism, perfectionism, and performance.
Folks, yesterday I grasped the gospel for myself!
