No really, I wish you were. Mostly because this blog doesn’t do justice to what I’m experiencing. At all. You could read every World Race blog, from every World Racer, and still not have an accurate picture of what this experience truly is.
I wish I could let you in on all the questions running through my head daily like, “There is so much work to be done, love to share and good news to spread…am I willing to give my whole life to this, to others, no matter the cost?” or, “How come I say I want growth, and when the opportunity comes I complain about how hard it is, or I shy away?” or, “Why didn’t I pay attention in Spanish class instead of trying to get attention from the cute girl behind me?” or, “God, will I ever stop trying to wrestle control away from you?” or a hundred-thousand others.
I wish I could let you in on all the small joys I encounter daily like having a little four year old Spanish kid shout my name repeatedly as he sees me walking into his home or, being encouraged by one single word during prayer with my team, or dancing without inhibition on the roof at night to worship music when no one’s around or, eating Super Tacos Bell street tacos…which are totally worth the “slight” indigestion or, a hundred-thousand others.
I wish I could let you in on all the frustrations I experience daily like not being able to just give people food, water or clothes despite their great need or, being frustrated that I see little-to-no change in myself despite a great desire for it or, trying to learn from and honor and be patient with someone I know God has put in front of me, even though our personalities are opposites and the easy way out is simply to tolerate them or, listening to the voice of my Father telling me I don’t have to try to be enough for Him while having to fight the endless voices telling me I should be more, know more, love more and lead more or a hundred-thousand others.
I wish I could share all my joy and anger with you. My insights and frustrations. My questions and answers. My loneliness and community. My laughter and sadness. My sense of progression and a sense of a total lack of it. And Super Tacos Bell.
I wish you were here.
Because I can’t explain it to you. (And that’s killing me.) 
But I hope you keep reading. I’d love for you to share in the little I am able to get across. Because it’s life, and it’s better when we do it together. And blogs are better when we end them with cliché sentiments. Right?
Right? Anyone…?
I’d love prayer for clarity…to hear from and be led by Holy Spirit. Prayer for an eagerness to wake up early to be with Him in the morning and before bed. Prayer for peace in rest in knowing I don’t have to strive to be enough, to God or to anyone. Prayer for a desire to want less, and to want to give more. Prayer that the eyes and ears of my heart would be open. And prayer to be willing to accept whatever they receive.
Thanks. Love you guys.
(By the way…the photos are completely unrelated. Just some stuff I shot around town.)
