Sometimes, I feel like I need a vacation from my own brain.
(Though vacation from my brain would cause major withdrawal, too… Haha. Good thing Jesus answers when I cry out, “Save me from myself!”)
Here’s a snippet of some recent thoughts. Welcome to my mind.
The number of tabs I have open (currently 30, and that’s just one window) is proportional to the size of my web of elusive thoughts and questions: ever-increasing.
This seems to support the law of entropy—a trend to disorder and chaos within a closed system.
Yet at the same time, what feels like entropy in the moment is actually functioning toward greater order, not disorder. Entropy as a means by which order is birthed? What a weird phenomenon. But I wonder if this was part of God’s purpose in entropy— to drive us toward a need for order and restoration found only in Him. How crazy that even the second law of thermodynamics points to the need for Jesus and His entropy-defying nature. Crazy? Or obvious? Or both. I believe God often allows things to get worse so that He can show it is He who makes them better, just as He waits to be gracious and to show compassion and mercy to us [Isaish 30:18].
Larger scale Biblical examples?
The perfect law and sinful man in need of Jesus the Savior to fulfill the law and bring freedom.
The death and resurrection of Jesus, miracle of miracles.
The chaos of the end times, leading up to Jesus’ second coming.
You and I, shameful and depraved, pursued and delivered by the Almighty God of the universe.
I never knew that the Greek word for shame is entrope, meaning “turning inward (upon oneself).” It makes so much sense. Turning in on yourself is indeed a downward spiral of degradation. For the creation itself was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. [Romans 8:20-21]
Our pitiful disarray calls desperately for that outside force. Only the Lord exists outside our realm, and only He can defy the laws within it.
In Jesus, we are not captives to entropy anymore; we acknowledge and learn from it, but we know we can now defy it!
The same goes for our past. Our past does not dictate but rather shapes our present and future.
How beautiful is the redeeming work of Jesus through all things, orderly and chaotic, now and then and forevermore!
I’ll end here the same way I’ll begin part 2 of this blog, with some words the Lord gave me back in late February:
Create space for wreckage. Do not despise it; embrace and bless it. I will renew and restore. I am making all things new, no exceptions.
[continued in Part 2]
