I've been trying to write a blog for like a week. I literally have about 20 different paragraphs started with different ideas and thoughts that will just not flow together. As I'm writing this we are currently exiled from our house as the septic system is being pumped so that our broken and abused toilet will hopefully start working again.
Everything here is always loud. There are always conversations going on, usually over top of each other. It seems like someone is always playing the guitar in our house. Roosters are crowing, dogs are barking, firecrackers are going off and cars are driving by with speakers attached to the roof yelling advertisements. Church services are filled with head splittingly loud worship music and the speakers often deem it appropriate to yell.
Ministry often seems slow. Instead of feeding the homeless or building homes, it seems that our ministry mostly includes going to church and learning to live with each other. This month of adjustment has been hard for most of us. We've been sick, frustrated, confused and discouraged. Life seems to be made complicated by it's lack of busyness.
Other months will be different, but spending time wishing this month was over would be a tragedy. God is still doing great things even if we don't know what they are. I think old wounds are being rooted out and healed over. I think we are being forced to wrestle with the things that scare and confuse us. I hope none of you read this and think I am complaining because I feel so blessed and excited to be here. And I will miss a lot of things about this place when we leave, such as the incredible hospitality, the beautiful landscapes, a real shower and time to reflect on the goodness and grandeur of the Lord.
I really don't understand all that's happening in El Salvador. Sometimes it seems almost impossible to hear God's voice or even my own thoughts over all the noise. The results of our ministry are rarely tangible. But in the midst of this time I have every confidence that God is stretching me in just the exact ways that I need to be stretched, healing me in ways I need to be healed, preparing me in exactly the ways I need to be prepared and using me in exactly the ways He wants to use me.
