Well to answer my Buzzfeed blog title that probably got some of you here, you show up anyway.
I’ll explain.
I’m a huge believer in Jesus and Steve Pressfield’s view on creativity. That there’s art in everyone of us that needs to be expressed and there’s a part of us called resistance that’s does everything in its power to keep us from expressing that. This art is different for every person and is not bound to to painting, writing, music, etc. An artist can do her work on a spreadsheet or by working on cars.
Your art is the thing that scares you to succeed at.
For me, that’s storytelling through writing and film. I love everything about the film making process. Writing, acting, directing, lighting, editing, getting coffee for people on set. GAH. I grin thinking about how each step can alter the story being told to make it better. That’s why you should always drink good coffee when you’re creating. Input is output.
Journal entry where I had to call myself out for not showing up the way I need to.
So when my computer got stolen in month four that kinda put a damper on my Spielberg infused dreams for the race. It meant going from my professional editing software to iMovie which makes me feel like a caveman when I edit. It felt like stealing an oven from a French pastry chef and giving him an easy bake. I imagine this victimized chef as French because it’s funny to hear him say scare bleu. What I learned though this is that I needed to let go of ideals and show up anyway.
Shooting on an iPhone and editing in iMovie isn’t the dream set up. At all. It doesn’t matter though. Why? Because if Spielberg, Hitchcock, or any of the other filmmakers I love heard my laments of not having the ideal equipment they wouldn’t give me the time of day. ET was made out of chicken wire and play dough. Hitchcock made a suspense movie with no music just to see if he could. Plus, when I get past my angst, I can see the people and landscape around me are so beautiful it’s hard make a bad video. There are a lot more solutions to making good art when you start looking for the ways you’re going to make it happen rather than the set backs in front of you. Turns out some of my friends have big kid cameras and to my benefit they’re learning about selflessness and how to share.
I do this with Jesus a lot too. If I don’t have my ideal space for Him to move, I don’t let Him. If my morning quiet time doesn’t have my favorite coffee mug then how could the Lord actually speak to me? It’s not that I don’t want to meet with God, it’s just there’s some part of me that keeps me from doing what I know is good for me. I think it’s part of being human. I found the remedy to this problem is to show up despite how I feel.
Showing up doesn’t have to be a grand act. You just have to act. Spielberg didn’t start out making blockbusters. But he started and that’s how he made Jaws when he was in his twenties.
I think God moves when we look our humanity in the eye and recognize that we don’t want to do what He has for us because it’s not ideal and scary and we show up anyway.
