Few of you may know, but many of you do not.
I have been doing a lot of research and self-reflection since I began my World Race journey. There is no pretty way to say this, but recently I have decided to no longer continue on with my World Race trip. This may come to a surprise to many of you because everything about it seemed to fit me and I seemed to fit the missional adventure perfectly. Initially, I thought so too. But the more I researched, the more as time went on, and the more I acknowledged my own thoughts and feelings about the race, I realized that this trip was not for me. Quite a few things did not sit right with my heart regarding safety and beliefs. There were MANY reasons that led me to this decision, but the two biggest reasons were:
1) I was feeling homesick already and I wasn’t even gone yet! I have a lot of connections here that I cherish deeply and having limited contact with people from home who have made me who I am today, honestly made me sick to think about.
2) I had this frequent underlying thought that I kept ignoring while I was preparing for the World Race that “I cannot wait till next year in November when I am home. Then the trip will be done and I can say I did it!” I was already looking forward to the end. That isn’t how you want to start ANY trip.
I have learned A LOT about myself through this whole process. One of the biggest lessons I have learned is that self-awareness is important. Because it helps us understand ourselves and to shine light on the next step in our life. Self-awareness shows maturity and personal growth. How can we be more self-aware? By being honest about our thoughts, feelings, needs, strengths, weaknesses, limitations, personality, character, hopes, and desires. Learning about ourselves is a journey in itself!
To be completely honest, I am at peace about this decision and I’m glad I figured this out now before investing much more on this trip. Regardless of how this ended up, this has been an incredible journey. I do believe God led me down this path to teach me more about myself. Like with everything else, He cares more about our hearts than what we actually do. I also think He has led me down this path to open me up for other opportunities, which I am excited about! Such as a couple shorter mission trips in the future next year! I am still looking into them, so we shall see how these develop. Another opportunity is to finish a book that I have been writing for over a year now. The focus of the book is on three foundational truths that God has been showing me throughout my life. And I believe every human wants to believe these beautiful truths about themselves and each other. I’m 2/3’s of the way finished and I’m excited to see where this will lead!
Feel free to email me or message me with any questions regarding this post. This blog will be taken down by the organization on Friday. Also I have been humbled by those of you who have graciously donated already. Like WOW. Thank you just isn’t enough. I want you to know that you each will be fully refunded because that is the right thing to do. I appreciate everyone’s support IMMENSELY during this journey!! I’ve been humbled and beyond blessed to be loved by so many people. Thank you ALL for your love and support.
Much love to you all.
