I don’t mean to sound dramatic, but I’m desperate for FREEDOM, all over and
in general. I’m pretty sure I’m the only one holding me back, but
I’ve lived in my people pleasing, risk-free comfort zone, showing you
only about 70% of who I am for WAY TOO LONG! And only 70 % because
there’s a good chunk of the other 30% that I didn’t know about
myself or trust others with.
I’m so tired of thinking for so long about every single
thing I do, asking myself, “Is this what defines me best?”
I’m SO over it. Have the stinkin’ mocha frappe, wear the gray nail
polish, buy that thing because you love it…and on and on and on.
This might seem completely normal to some, but its not for me. Don’t
judge. There are a million other things I could tell you about discovering freedom, but I really want to tell you about this one…
Back in February I had the
chance to get my nose pierced and didn’t because I was too worried
about what it would mean. “It doesn’t really mesh with my life back
home…” Also I gained the approval of some people in my group for
not doing it when several other girls had. I later felt disgusted to
realize how much I do, and for that matter, don’t do to be pleasing other
people! So, for the whole month of March, I contemplated it, like I
do, and determined not that I wanted to get my nose pierced,
but that I had to. No one on my team went with me (a WR no-no,
sorry), so in the moment of truth I squeezed the hand of my Sicilian
contact, Eliseo, who being tatted up and pierced himself, was fully
supportive 🙂 No worries, my family isn’t finding out through this
blog, they’ve known the whole time.
gals on the Race are likely to do: get a tattoo, shave their heads,
and get their noses pierced. I didn’t know that beforehand, and yes,
all those things have happened on my squad!
lovely.
