I began applying for the Race in August of 2016. I remember filling out essay questions, talking with close friends, praying about it a lot. I remember getting the call on my way home from work that September telling me I had been accepted to the program and then calling my mom and best friend to tell them the news.
When you get accepted to the World Race you still have to make a choice to accept your acceptance. They ask that you put in the first 150 dollars of your personal money to show that you are all in. I put the money in and thought – this is it. It’s for real now. That same night I walked into a brand new bible study at a brand new church. The Lord’s timing blows my mind. I shared my acceptance with a friend and a few people I had never met before. Minutes later I was talking to a former World Racer. I had never met anyone who had done the Race until this point. The Lord knew exactly what was on my mind, so the Spirit gave her words that would echo in my mind repeatedly for over a year.
”Don’t worry about the money. God already has a plan for all of it.” – Were the first words out of her mouth.
I watched the fundraising online training that AIM has us do, talked with my mobilizer about the process and then the ideas started flooding in. I could wrap presents for Christmas for donations, I could ask family to donate instead of giving gifts, I made brochures, I designed a t-shirt. I thought about restaurants I could reach out to for fundraisers. I made up a list of people who I thought would want to support me. In my mind I could do this.
But I couldn’t. December was as it always is for teachers, filled with work night and day. No time for wrapping presents, no time for letters, no time for fundraisers. In my mind I had lots of time and so I procrastinated in doing what the Lord had called me to do, focused on my own plans instead. And then before I knew it – it was 2017. I had 5 months to hit my 5,000 dollar mark or I wouldn’t be able to do training camp.
We studied the shield of faith in Bible study that month. I remember breaking down crying because I knew that I had let my fear of rejection get in the way of fundraising the way the Lord wanted me to. I had hidden behind my personal plans and excuses for procrastinating. It was a wake up call, a step in the right direction, but I still wasn’t quite there yet.
When you decide to become a missionary you decide to dedicate your life to the Lord. That means trusting Him with everything. But we don’t realize what it means to truly trust God until we have to rely on Him to do something we can’t do ourselves. Raising 18,000 dollars wasn’t something I could do on my own. It sounds simple, obvious, but it’s a hard realization when it hits you just how inadequate you are and just how much more work the Lord has left to do on your heart. This is why the fundraising process is so important. It’s not about the money, it’s a matter of your heart.
It’s a process that breaks your heart sometimes. It’s a process that can be extremely scary. It’s a process that forces you to take a stand in sharing who you are and what you believe in with those you’ve always tried to hide it from. It’s a process that breaks you down and humbles you. It’s a process that teaches you true reliance on the Lord and what risk taking actually means. It’s the process by which God molds you into a person who can no longer deny the miracles He does when you step out in obedience. For me it was an emotional roller coaster of doubt, fear, sadness, wondering if the Lord heard me, awe, joy, amazement, and realizing I had a God I could trust beyond my wildest dreams.
I remember being heart broken when people I had known for years didn’t respond to phone calls or meetings, when they said they couldn’t support, or flat out just didn’t want to. It wasn’t even about the money. I legit just wanted so many people to be a part of this journey in some way. Sometimes I would get an empty promise, and that too was a hard realization. But I was relying on my friends and family for things the Lord wanted me to go to Him for. Being a missionary means being rejected on the field. Being told no by someone you thought for sure would want to support you, who you desperately wanted to be a part of this, is the first step in learning how to deal with that. It hurt at the time, but it was a beautiful part of God’s plan.
I remember the first time I really stepped out in obedience. It was a few weeks before training camp. I had scheduled a garage sale because I needed to do something to meet my first deadline. I still didn’t trust the Lord fully to get that money in on time. A few days beforehand I heard the Lord clearly tell me I needed to run a 5K with my backpack, at the same time as my scheduled fundraiser. I felt awful and guilty leaving my best friend behind to run my garage sale for me while I ran a 5 K for refugees. But, the Lord used a connection I had made at church a few weeks prior to make another brief connection before the run. The woman said she wanted to donate. That night I got an email. 1000.00 dollars had been put in my account. My best friend was there. I ran to tell her sobbing and laughing at the same time. I was going to training camp.
I came back from training camp ready to hit the ground running. But then I got sick. And then I got scared again of rejection. What if I could’t launch? Could I accept it if it the Lord’s plan was for me to wait till January? Would my supporters think I wasn’t reliable, not a woman of my word? I filled life with logistical things, moving, renting. The clock kept ticking. I picked up the God Ask. Reading seemed easier than asking for money. I studied that book. I questioned the Lord and His plans. And then I finished the book. I knew I had a choice. I was scared of what people would think of me asking for money. I was scared if I asked I would be rejected. I was scared that I would step out in faith and the Lord might choose to make me defer anyway.
I chose courage over fear. I wrote letters and mailed them. I sent emails out to strangers. I made phone calls. I set up those appointments AIM had recommended almost a year prior. I sat and shared my mission with strangers. It was scary and awkward, but also beautiful. I met wonderful beautiful people, who responded with kindness and encouragement whether they could financially support me or not.
I was afraid I would’t be able to launch. I remember being 900 dollars away and talking with my mobilizer about what would happen if I didn’t make it. The Lord told me to volunteer at a shelter. I was more than happy to obey. A woman I volunteered with wanted to donate. 2 days later I was funded for launch. By the time I launched I had already met my September deadline.
This last deadline was different. Being here I knew the Lord had a plan. Those words I had heard over a year ago echoed in my mind over and over again.
I stand today not just fully funded, but equiped. This process taught me how to deal with rejection and disappointment. The Lord worked miracles that blew my mind, that I fall back on when the enemy wants me to doubt. This process taught me how to share my faith and my vision with strangers. It taught me obedience and reliance on the Lord that would not exist if not for this process.
About 60 people have supported me financially and countless more through encouragement and prayer. Of those 60 people, over half of my supporters I met after being accepted to the World Race. Some donations have come from people I’ve never met before and others from businesses and churches who were simply obedient even though they didn’t know me. I would not be who I am today without this process. But looking back I did very little. The Lord made connections for me and lead me to brothers and sisters with obedient hearts. Furthermore, He led me to a woman‘s Bible study that supported me in prayer and encouragement. I don’t even know the full extent of the support I have been given, I imagine one day the Lord will show me the intricate web He created to make my Race possible.
For anyone who has been part of this journey in anyway big or small, I want you to know that I am inexpressibly grateful for the person you have helped me become, the work we have accomplished together, and for the person the Lord will grow me to be over the next 7 months. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, not just for funding me, praying for me, and encouraging me- but for equipping me.
Blessings to you all!
Liz
