Ok, I am just going to go ahead and say it: I am addicted to half pieces of gum. I know, I know, you would never expect me of all people to be caught in such an obnoxious habit. I didn’t think it was that bad until I was cleaning out my school pack, my car, and pockets yesterday and had to throw away literally handfuls of little half wrappers of gum. In fact the whole beginnings of this post came from a recent thought process of how to pack enough gum (trident extra care of course!) to last me for 11 months. I fell into this habit a few years ago when I realized that not ONLY do half pieces of gum make the pack last TWICE as long, but it is much more ergonomic on my mouth to only chew half the amount at a time (I don’t think the word ergonomic even works there but I am going for it…). This is my grand realization: I can clean out my house, get rid of all my stuff, and be physically prepared to go on this crazy world race adventure, but that will only take me so far. There are so many little nuances, habits, and addictions in my life that are going to be seriously brought to the surface as I leave my home.
This is why Jesus pushes us out of comfort and pulls us into a greater identity in him! This is why he asks his disciples to bring NOTHING with them as they go preach and call people to repent. This is why he asks the rich young ruler to give up all his stuff and follow him. Once we give up our security blanket in exchange for abundant life we move into the light of Jesus and begin to realize what other weird little habits are in our lives. We should not be content staying the same, but constantly be moving into more of the identity that Jesus has intended for us.
What are you holding on to? I am not talking about stuff, or even gum dependencies, but that is all a cover up for a greater deficiency. What routine or what habit is so important that it would hurt to give to Jesus? The hardest addictions to break are the ones we like because they aren’t necessary wrong. I like my half pieces of gum and waking up every morning to a cup of coffee. I really love my bed and 8 hours of sleep every night. I love having a routine to default to. All of these are blessings, and I am pretty sure Jesus does not have a problem with any of them, but if I am not willing to switch it up and change to follow him, then I will be missing out. And I really don’t want to miss out.
So what is my point? Not too sure to be entirely honest. I have thought about it a couple days and I really don’t know where I am going with this one. All I know is that I am in a serious crossroads of BIG change right now. Half of me is excited and half of me is resisting it. I am curious to see what is going to be stirred up… guess we will just have to wait and see!
