I've started to write this blog 5 times and each time I sound all dreamy and idealistic, which is probably pretty accurate to how I'm actually feeling but here we go, again.
Recently, God has really been stirring some things up. I'm beginning to question life long dreams and goals that I thought God had confirmed over the years. And all of a sudden I am REALLY excited to be going to Africa. A few months ago I viewed Africa as the months I had to survive before going to Asia and Central America but I'm beginning to see things differently, maybe more clearly and it’s weird.
I was fully prepared to be changed on the Race. You would be a fool to think you would come back the same person you left as but I was not expecting God to use the race to change me before I even left! Yet here I am sitting in my huge bed in Nashville genuinely excited to live uncomfortably…in Africa.
Here’s what I mean when I say I’m seeing things more clearly if I can articulate my spinning thoughts well. I am NOT taking a leave of absence from the “real world” or “prolonging my adolescence”. This is NOT just another mission trip or service trip but the next step of obedience in my walk with Christ. I have been praying for a life set apart for years now and it looks like that is exactly the life God has been designing just for me. I will be challenged in new ways and I will see God move. I will continue to live my life by seeking the Lord’s face but I will just happen to sleep in a different country each month with other “crazy youngsters” beside me.
I know I have been asking each of you for a lot lately but I’m going to ask for something else. I would really appreciate your prayers. No seriously, would you pray for me? I really want to find out how and where my passions and skills can be best used for God’s kingdom. That could mean working in the beauty industry as a make up artist or a lawyer fighting for justice. That could mean living in Chicago, Illinois or Jeffery’s Bay, South Africa. This could mean being a wife and mother to children all over the world or being a woman who smuggles bibles into a restricted country.
If you asked me 6 years ago, heck even 6 months ago, I would have timidly told you I wanted to go to law school now I'm just not sure. All I know is that I want to learn more about what my gifts, skills, and passions are as God opens up my heart for whatever comes.
** Thanks Kate for your pictures from Kenya.
