Finally home with all my stuff! Carrying all that you own makes materialism take on a new meaning.
I have been back in North Carolina for one week and five days now. It feels like I have been here much longer. I have actually only been at home for two full days so far, but am in Charlotte now and excited to stay put for at least a week! I spent four days at the beach with extended family, three days at the beach by myself, and three days in the mountains with my best girlfriends from college. So far I’ve stayed a nomad, but I’ve chucked the backpack for a good duffel bag.
Family at Ocean Isle
In Asheville with my best girlfriends from Elon
Leaving my friends and family who walked beside me for the past year was hard, but was made much easier by the fact that I get to be reunited with the girls on Team FUSE at the end of September in Tennessee; I guess its kind of like a debrief for month 12 and I am so thankful for it.
Overall, the greatest thing I’ve been surprised by is how easy it has been. There have been hard things, and I suppose perhaps I am still moving too fast at this point to really process everything, but the culture shock I’ve been experiencing has been mild and the transition has seemed much more natural than I thought it might. I have been surprised out how comfortable I am in my old environment and how familiar it feels. I have been gone for a year, but in some ways it seems like I never left.
Janina and Marisa. I have been with these girls almost every second of every day for the past year!
At the same time, I know that even if my environment hasn’t changed that much, I have changed. Its not like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole; its still a round peg going into a round hole – but the round peg now has more life and color and trust and brokenness than it did before. Even as I discuss and share the things I’ve learned and seen I don’t know if people see these new things in me, but I know they are there.
But really I think the thing that has made this transition easy is that He is just with me. My biggest prayer was that God would give me intimacy with Him through this transition, and He has. In addition to that, He has given me provision and contentedness.
In Guatemala we challenged ourselves to pray for something specific. When I asked God what to pray for He told me to ask for a car, so I did and believed He would give it to me. Not only did He bring me a car, but He brought it right away. My parents picked me up from the airport in a new car for me! I did a little dance in the parking lot in appreciation to the Lord, but I am so thankful to my parents too (Mom, if you see this, you can make me dance in appreciation to you and Dad later).
Dad and I with my new car!
It is also very unlike me not to know what the next step is. I’m a visionary, and I like to know what the future holds. I have some ideas, but really I don’t know (at least for now). Sometimes its just better not to. I trust God and am just content in Him.
The one thing I do know is that I am called to be a missionary for the long haul. I don’t know exactly where or what that’s going to look like, but there is nothing else that I can give my life to. As God reveals His plans to me, I will continue to let you know how you can partner with me to build His Kingdom. It is so grand and I can’t believe I get to do this with my life.
As I am home, I would love to share some stories and some things I learned with you, and answer any questions that you may have (not that I have the answers!). Whether it is your family, or your Sunday school class, or your Bible study, or your church…or just YOU, if you are interested I would love to share with you. It is my heart’s desire, so please don’t hesitate to ask. I will be available beginning in October.
I know the race is over, but I will continue to post some things here; maybe share some stories I wasn’t able to before, repost some teammates’ blogs, and try to relate to you some of the things I have learned. Please continue to stop by and look for new things when you have the time!
If you have given to me, prayed for me, or encouraged me, I cannot thank you enough for everything you have done. We could not have done it without you!
Team FUSE at our final banquet in San Jose, Costa Rica
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.
– Philippians 4:12-13
