So here I sit in a Cafe in Costa Rica shaking my head as I dread looking up my finances. Part of me knows it hasn’t varied since the last time I checked only 24 hours ago, but ones heart can only have hope. Right?
Why is it that I now have some doubts? Why is it so different now? Why didn’t God provide what I needed by the deadline? The questions run through in my mind as the computer screen confirms my first assumption.
As of July 12th 2014 you owe (1,897.38)
What is it God? Is this some sort of test? What do I do…
My heart is quickened to go to the word and find my answer there. Good thing I packed my bible on my trip into the city. Flipping through the white pages of my bible the sight of black ink caught my eye. I marked Romans 5:3-5 in January earlier this year, with anticipation that there would be trials on my new found journey. I remember this striking me as a promise from the Lord to remember when I’m in the midst of a trial.
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know they help us develop endurance. and endurance develops strength of character, and character develops our confidant hope of salvation, and this hope will not lead us to disappointment for we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.”
So, the answer is to rejoice because God is a perfect God who loves me utterly. To know that the trial I’m going through is not only to develop character in Christ but also develops the confident hope that God is who he says he is and can do what he said he will do. And rather than feeling empty and alone through this trial, I was given a gift, a part of my creator living inside of me filling my heart with his perfect love and perfect peace that only could come from him and the Promise that He holds my world in the palm of his hand.
A friend of mine once said ” What is any sum of money to our Daddy who walks on streets of Gold”.
Though I still don’t understand the Lords timing, I Trust him with my world. I still choose to believe in Gods perfect provision for this journey. And I BELIEVE MY FATHER when he says I WILL PROVIDE.
- If you are reading this and would also like to help me stay on this life changing journey, please feel free to support me by finding the “support me” tab to the left of this web page.
- If you are reading this and know the struggle of believing God for what he Can do not what you think he Can do, please pray with me. Pray that God would continually reveal more of himself to me and that my endurance would grow. Pray that God would continue giving me peace in waiting for his timing and that I would continue to rejoice for our God is good, even in the storm.
