Recently, my squad partook in an adventure of
white water rafting the Nile. My raft went by the name of “Bada$$es of the
Nile�. We consisted of 6 manly men and 3 hardcore girls. We purposefully
tried to flip while battling rapids. It was like that old school brand “No Fear.� I was cocky of my swimming
skills and would ensure friends, “just don’t panic and you’ll be fine.�
However, my pride was soon swallowed up, literally. The last rapid we fought
was called “The Bad Place�, probably named after people who died there. These
rapids were powerful. They were awe-inspiring.
They were frightening. It was God’s
creation in it’s fullest. The
lifeguard instructor in me wanted to be brave but the massiveness of this
portion of the Nile made me think otherwise.
Many Christian songs compare God’s love for us to
the ocean, to the endless sea, to a deep abyss, to something that swallows us
up and consumes us. When I sing these songs now, I think of “the Bad Place.� I
think of how scared I was to go in. God’s love might also look daunting at
first, so wide, so deep, so incomprehensible,
but I write to challenge Fear.
When I was forced out of the raft at “the bad
place�, I was more than frightened. The waves crashed over me one after another.
The water was big and mighty. It swallowed me and held me.
God’s love is like that. It is all consuming and
it washes every bit of dirt away. It throws you around a lot but leaves you
floating breathless.
I can testify today that the Nile did not drown
me, but God’s love has. Oh, this is how I will live my life: brave and willing
to swallow some water now and again as long as it means I am drowning in love.
Come. Wash over me. Drown away my fears.
