I feel bad for how short my last blog was and I feel like yall deserve some insight on what my life has been like for the last week.
I arrived in El Sal last Wednesday and immediately met the Santos family. They’re a family of 6 that my team, one other team, and my squad leader will be living with. That makes 20 of us in one house. So we hit the “living in community” concept pretty hard. The Santos family is so sweet and they do everything they can to make us feel at home, however they don’t speak English. Communication is very hard, at home and at ministry sites. We cram all of us into a 12 passenger van and into a back of a pick up truck and that’s how we get around. We eat pupusas all the time (a tortilla filled with cheese or beans or chicken or all). We sleep outside under a tin cover that the family so generously built for us! Bucket showers are also an everyday thing here (well not everyday, I don’t care if that’s nasty I have no shame). It’s an adjustment, but all those things are the easiest part of the race for me.
God is revealing some huge things in my heart. And it’s honestly heart breaking. I wish I had the words to explain but I can’t. I also am finding that it’s okay to not be able to describe my relationship with Jesus because it’s MY relationship. But I can say I need some prayers and I’m also asking for some respect with these personal changes that might become more apparent to yall with time. I have hit a place of brokenness that I’ve never felt before but I’ve also come to a place of dependency on the Father that I’ve never felt before. I don’t think I’ve ever prayed harder, cried harder, praised harder, and loved my God harder than I have since I’ve been here. Which is why I came. I wanted to get this dependency. But I didn’t think I would have to go to rock bottom to feel it.
I guess you can all see why my last blog was so short, the things I’m feeling aren’t really something I’m proud nor want to share. But I am desperate for prayers. I love you guys and I am so thankful for the support you have given me.
