The first night of training camp they asked us if we were willing to lay down our expectations and rights of entitlement. My immediate answer was, “Yes, of course, that’s easy. I can lay down my expectations for 11 months. No problem.”
The outcome is that there have been many times in the last 11 months when I did NOT lay down my expectations and rights of entitlement. I felt that God owed me something, like a blessing, and because I was serving Him, I felt that I deserved it.
The TRUTH is that’s not correct…God doesn’t owe me anything, and second truth is that HE ALREADY GAVE ME EVERYTHING…salvation, eternity, unconditional love, etc.
But, somewhere along the way though I forgot that He doesn’t owe me anything and that
I OWE HIM MY EVERYTHING!
As I finished month 10 in Cambodia and began the journey to Malaysia for month 11 (yes I am in the last month of my Race…crazy), I suddenly began to tell God what I expected Him to provide for me in Malaysia. Some of these “demands” included a bed, a hot shower, a clean house/hostel, A/C, and a ministry that I could be excited about and that didn’t demand too much energy because I’m tired.
Well my team leader shared the information about our ministry in Malaysia…we are living in a hostel, teaching English with a full schedule, and working with another team. But then this changed…we are living with a Hindu family, working in a city 2 hours away from the other team, and teaching English only Saturdays and Sundays.
(Just a side note: on the World Race, you never REALLY know what your living situation and ministry look like until you arrive at your destination.)
On that note…I began to imagine the worst…TEACHING ENGLISH AGAIN AHHH!!!! As I heard about some of the details for other teams on my squad I got jealous because their month “sounded way better than what I was about to walk into.”
It’s crazy! I became Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and felt that I deserved the very best in EVERYTHING and if I didn’t get it I was going to SCREAM!
WHAT?!? Who am I to feel that I DESERVE these provisions and that I am ENTITLED to live a certain way or work in a certain ministry?
When we arrived in Gua Musang…all of my expectations were shattered (as always). I was completely humbled (yet again) to find that God, despite my being a demanding brat, is blessing me abundantly in this last month.
We have been living one week in a clean hostel…comfortable mattresses, two cold showers, a squatty potty, a western toilet, a refrigerator, a toaster, a water boiler, fans, and electricity.
Another blessing is that our contacts set up for us to attend a Christian church service where we got to praise Jesus in the middle of a country that imprisons Christians.
And the last blessing (so far) is that we got to spend one-night/two days in Cameron Highlands: tea plantations, strawberry farm, butterfly center, honeybee farm, delicious meals, and Starbucks! It was an amazing mini vacation.
Shout with joy to God, all the earth! Sing the glory of His name; make his praise glorious! Say to God, “How awesome are your deeds!” –Psalm 66:1-3
Check out Facebook for more photos from our trip to Cameron Highlands
