Lately I’ve been looking back on old journal entries, and they pretty much all consist of “take all of me, Lord” “this life is yours” “I don’t need anything but you” Writing those words is really easy and sounds pretty great. Radically depending on The Lord is something I’ve been striving for over the past month, yet when something happens where I actually have to do so- I find myself mad that He is making me do that exact thing.
Then, I listen to Christian music where it talks about giving all of ourselves to Him. “So I’ll stand with arms high and heart abandoned.” A convicting lyric to the song “The Stand” by Hillsong talking about abandoning our hearts to The Lord. So I began to think more about what a life of abandonment to our God looks like and looked up the definition for the word- “abandoned- having been deserted or cast off” is the exact translation. Deserted. Cast off. And when I think about those words I think about myself standing alone in the absolute middle of no where with no one and nothing around me. Cast out from every single person I love. Crap. Now I’m not saying that this is going to happen to me or any of you, but it certainly could. And if it did would you still stand still with your arms high saying “take more Lord” “this life is Yours” “You are all I need” Would you still stay true to who you are, and who The Lord says you are even when it feels like your world is falling apart? We can say/sing/write anything we want, but do we realize the weight of the words that we are proclaiming? It is so easy to say we trust The Lord, but when things get rough do we run? Because is that actually trust at all. My prayer is that we stand firm, and fully trust that God is molding our will to His.
