There is sometimes a sense of insecurity that I find within myself. It’s there because every so often, I feel like I won’t be able to make this trip happen. It’s this doubt that resides in the back of my mind and occasionally will chatter in my ear saying, “14,000 dollars? Are you kidding me? that’s way too much money to raise, how on earth are you going to do this? You don’t have any work ethic to make this happen, You’re not good enough to even be on this trip.”
I’ll then take a step back from these thoughts, look at them and think, “none of that is true” and move on. Focusing my mind on these thoughts only makes things worse. It only kills my faith so why would I pay any attention to them. I’ve learned that the more you ponder your dark thoughts, those ideas that make you sort of flinch a little, the worse it’ll be. I’m not saying that I’m just completely ignoring all the bad stuff and forgetting that any of it exists, I’m saying that when it’s all you ever think about and you constantly worry about the scary thoughts, the worse things will turn out.
In Philippians 4:8 it says “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” This is so true when it comes to anything in life. God wants us to be positive thinkers, he wants us to keep focusing on the light. There is nothing good that comes from focusing our minds on these negative thoughts that arise.
Jesus said in Matthew 6:33-34 “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” These verses always give me hope when the doubts arise. I don’t need to worry, I don’t need to panic about anything because I know everything is going to be provided by God. I have that God is helping me through this whole process.
I’m not just going to sit and think, “God drop down all this money and I’m going to do nothing, I’m just gonna wait here”. Theres another verse in the bible that pertains to this! James 2:26 says, “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.” It’s pretty motivating. If I just sit back and not work at all towards this, then my faith will be dead as well.
That verse plus this, Matthew 21:21 “Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.” and this, (Basically synonymous with last verse) Mark 11:24 “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”
This is the most relevant bible verse in my life. I know for a fact that if I have the faith(plus the works) that I have already received this money, God is going to provide it. I know without a doubt this trip is going to be funded and that I will be going on this 9 month journey. So far, $3500 has been raised and I need to have 5000 by May. I’ve sold roughly 200 coupon books that are worth $5 each and there are going to be even more fundraisers. Stay updated with my blog by subscribing because there will actually be more posts in the future. I haven’t posted in a while because this blogging stuff is still new to me. I hope that you guys can pray for me as I continue on my walk in faith.
