Hi everyone, this is Lily’s mom, Rachel. I want to first thank Lily for allowing me to crash her blog for this entry. World Race certainly stresses the fact that our kids are now adults and able to make their own decisions and so I am thankful that she has decided to allow me to share her platform for this one short time. I wanted to write from the perspective of people we don’t hear much about, the families of missionaries. Parents, children, sisters, brothers, boyfriends and girlfriends, aunts and uncles, all who work tirelessly to prepare our family member to go, who fundraise for months before, who worry about all of the details, who pray and support at all times, but who ultimately are left behind when those we love are called into God’s service.
This is the second child we have had to release into God’s care to serve Him in far off lands, very different from our own familiar little world. Letting our oldest daughter go was excruciating. Maybe because she is such a sensitive soul, maybe because she was the first, or maybe it had something to do with that 7.8 magnitude earthquake that hit the very small corner of the world where our child was during that very narrow window of time during which she was there. But I truly believe that even if any of those circumstances were different, it still wouldn’t have made it any easier. To let your child go anywhere for any period of time without you can be difficult. Whether that is to college, or moving to another city or being sent off as the hands and feet of Jesus. It’s just this simple – it is hard. I admittedly may have a totally skewed perspective, but I believe that sending your child off traveling around the world without you, through third world countries and all kinds of possible difficulties and dangers, is especially hard. But it is necessary. Our kids (or brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, boyfriends, girlfriends, etc.) are called to go where many don’t wish to go ~ to love the unlovable ~ to be hope to the hopeless ~ to speak life where there was once only darkness.
When God’s call is upon your loved one’s life, it is undeniable. I could see that call in Lily for many years before she even knew herself. It is the reason she traveled with us from the very beginning on mission through the cities, slums and countryside of Honduras. It is why we were willing to send her off at the age of 17 for 6 weeks last summer without us. And it is the reason we have prepared for months to let her go in just a few short hours for the better part of the upcoming year. It is not our choice, or perhaps even hers, but if God has called her to go, who are we to stand in the way.
Understanding this, if you know someone who has launched, or is preparing to launch a family member into the mission field, here are the few words of wisdom that I have to offer:
- Be especially kind and handle them with care. We are often fragile – especially if our loved one has only launched recently. We are adjusting to a new norm in our lives without our loved one there and that can often leave us (particularly us missionary moms) very emotionally raw and vulnerable.
- Ask about their loved one often. It is important that we know others are thinking about and praying for them. This will mean more than you can possibly know.
- Please, please, please actually pray for them and for their loved one. I know it is easy to say you’ll pray and then life gets busy. But we don’t just throw out a request for support in the form of prayer as a polite alternative to making a financial contribution. WE DESPERATELY NEED AND WANT YOU TO ACTUALLY PRAY FOR OUR LOVED ONE. In fact, this is the most powerful thing you can do for us on this journey.
- Forgive them for the endless flow of fundraising requests and updates. They likely already feel uncomfortable about making multiple appeals for contributions, and would not be asking if it was not absolutely necessary. Please don’t feel compelled to donate if God has not put that on your heart, but don’t hold this against them either.
- Give them a hug. Tell them you know that this must be hard. Sometimes having someone recognize this is all that is needed to get through that hard week (or 2 weeks or a month or more…) when you haven’t heard from your worldchanger.
I can promise that missionary families will so appreciate these things, as will my husband and I in the coming weeks and months. And if you are reading this and you are a missionary family, be gentle on yourselves and let your friends family and church family in on these secrets.
And so, her father and I recognize this call on her life and let go of her with tear-filled eyes and broken hearts, but not without the peace of God that surpasses all understanding.
In His love,
Rachel & Jon Howard
“How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!” Isaiah 52:7
