As I mentioned in my previous blog, major shifts in my spiritual walk have taken place this month. As I’ve also mentioned in previous blogs, I’m kind of a skeptic. Doubt is often my biggest obstacle when it comes to God. Not that I doubt His ability to do anything, I doubt my ability to hear Him. Coming from a background in the Southern Baptist Church, a lot of the things we do on the Race are new for me, and I have to admit I struggle sometimes. At debrief at the beginning of December our squad leaders asked us to write down lies we believed about ourselves, and things God was calling us to walk in from now on. I wrote down the two words I heard, although I thought they were a little corny and didn’t really apply to me.
Warrior Princess.
Fast forward to later in the month during worship. We had been doing a lot of prophecy for each other, encouraging each other with words from the Lord. While I absolutely love doing this there’s always that moment of doubt… Am I really hearing this? Is this really the verse this person needs? What if this doesn’t apply to them at all? We definitely do not this at church back home! During corporate worship I felt like people would hear so much from God and I wouldn’t get anything. I began to get discouraged and not even really try anymore. One night I was sitting there frustrated, not feeling like I was getting anything when I heard Him loud and clear. It was so clear and distinct I got chills, almost like I could feel the words run through my veins. I frantically wrote down the words that would change my spiritual walk forever. Enough doubting.
You hear me clearly and you hear me often. I have given you words to speak, so stop silencing them and speak them boldly. Fight for people I tell you to fight for, be a steadfast stronghold for good. You are a warrior.
I can’t even really describe what happened in that moment, but everything inside me shifted. It was like every insecurity I had ever had had disappeared for a moment and I was suddenly everything He said I was. My teammate Lauren has said when you’re confident in who you are in God, you’re confident, period. That’s exactly what I felt, confidence. Confident because He told me what I was. It’s hard for me to explain the depth at which I felt all of this because it was like it was at the very core of who I am. It was, as I’ve said, life changing.
So, that’s kind of where I’m at right now, stepping into my role as a warrior princess. He has shown me what it looks like to fight for people like never before, for my team, for my squad, and even for my family and friends back home. I’m now walking in complete and total confidence that I hear God clearly, and it’s making a huge difference in my prayer life and time with God.
So I just wanted to take this opportunity to really and truly thank everyone who has supported me so far on this journey. I have grown and learned so much, and none of it would be possible without you. I am $867 away from being fully funded, which is incredible. By being obedient and generous, you are making a HUGE difference in my life and impacting the kingdom forever. God is using YOU in powerful ways, thank you for stepping into what He’s called you to do, it’s made all the difference.
