There are roughly 82 days until I wake up across the oceans on the other side of the world in South Africa. I will open my eyes and wake in a foreign land with a squad who will become closer than a brother. I will not be in the United States for 9 months, an entire school year, I will have limited direct communication with y’all back home, and if I run out of tampons I better hope someone will share.
And yet, I have a peace instilled so deep within me it does not falter. A peace not of my own strength or efforts, no, because my feelings change and fade and come once more. This peace is from the King of kings, who set the waters on its current, the sun on its route, and the seasons timing in perfect harmony. The closer I become to consistent change, the quicker the Spirit turns me towards the One who stands firm in a storm. He’s bigger than anything I will face, He’s more powerful than the cross, and He is more loving than the kindest words I will hear in my lifetime. I have peace because my God has won, and I think He can handle this time that is a blink of an eye.
A few months ago the Lord told me that I needed to begin intentionally preparing my heart for this mission and to begin praying for people my squad will meet overseas, and my my squad and their hearts as well. It is lovely how we can begin a sentence, “I began…” when truly the Lord is doing the seeking, the pursuing, and giving us the passion to seek something greater. So, He has been preparing me in so many ways as I look back, I see His hands were over everything and I’m grateful for our sovereign Lord having perfect timing for it all.
I’ve been reading Psalms and Proverbs daily for a while and the Spirit revealed to me the other day that God has been preparing me through the Psalms. All of the chapters where the writer feels like God has forsaken him, left him in the pit, or let his enemies conquer him; BUT STILL acknowledges who God is, that He is on the throne, and keeps His promises. God told me that on the World Race I will experience valleys like never before, I will see brokenness that will make me burn with righteous anger, and I will sometimes feel so alone that I cry out just as in Psalms saying, “God where are you? When will you hear our cry?”
Do you see how sovereign He is? How foreknowing His plans are? Before I even began realizing God was preparing me for the race He was instilling truths about Himself within me. So that when I have those fleeting feelings I will have the habit of turning to Him and reminding myself through His words that You are faithful and You keep Your promises Lord. He does not promise that this mission will be smooth sailing, He promises He will stay with us, and I must continually abide in Him. Before I was even accepted on the race God was changing my views on what “complete surrender” truly meant, what saying, “though none go with me, I still will follow” truly looks like, and how you can experience abundant freedom while sacrificing yourself as an offering to the King.
Even in the valley You are faithful. And I fully believe that, I may not always feel it, but thank goodness it’s our devotion that stays constant, and Your promises that stand true.
