Procrastination. Hesitance. Cowardice. Avoidance. Always saying “yes”. Each of these reactions are powered by fear. Fear of failing, of doing or saying the wrong thing, of not knowing what’s going to happen afterwards.
I’ve become more fearful as the World Race looms closer. I’ve procrastinated more than I have ever done in my life as the days pass until graduation. I’m not brave. Heck, I procrastinated on writing this blog post for the last week because I’ve been afraid it won’t be good!
But recognizing the fear is the first step. The second one, is to confront the source of the fear. The third step is of banishing the fear through whichever good means necessary.
For the World Race, I have so much to do: raise funds by writing and sending letters, writing and mailing thank you letters, buying all the clothing and items required for the trip, the list goes on and on. I became paralyzed by the sheer amount of things to do.
So my parents and I broke it down. I broke it down into bite-sized, weekly tasks: today, I’ll write a blog post. Tomorrow, I’ll finish it and put it up. The rest of the week will be on writing letters to companies to invite to raise funds for this trip.
By breaking down the tasks into smaller pieces, my brain stops turning in a carousel of terrified hesitance. Now, it’s about actually buckling down and doing it.
But why am I talking about this? How does it hold relevance to the World Race?
I’m going to have to surpass my various fears during my World Race. I’m the type of person who always says “yes”, because I don’t want to hurt others feelings by saying “no”. I often inadvertently bite off more than I can chew. I’m afraid of what will happen if I don’t bite.
My friends could get mad at me, or I’ll miss the opportunity of a lifetime, or, or, or. My mind races with all the bad possibilities that a “no” would produce. So I say yes, and I don’t fight my fear.
But as a good friend of mine said, sometimes I will need to step on people’s toes. And on the World Race, my fears will have to die. I say this with absolute certainty: I will have to relearn how to say “no” without feeling guilty. I will have to overcome my fears of procrastination and everything else.
I don’t know what plans God has for me on the Race, but I believe that He will help me overcome my fears through whichever means necessary. I don’t know what those means will be, but He does. So I’ll have to learn to adapt.
After all, Woody Allen sums it up best: “If you want to make God laugh, tell Him about your plans.”
Until next time!
A dangerous ray of sunshine signing off.
Do not be anxious about anything,
but in every situation,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ. (Philippians 4:6-7, NIV)
