In six months, I will be boarding a plane from PDX to meet up with my team before our eleven month adventure together. I will pack very little considering the length of how long I will be gone (which will be very hard for me because I like to be extra prepared!), and my best friend will probably load me up in her car. We’ll make our way down I-5 for the small commute, and we will discuss anything but the act of being gone. We will talk of memories, and how excited we are for what’s ahead and how I will call as soon as I can to hear her sweet voice that reminds me of home.
Home
I’ve never really been a person that has gotten too attached to a place; no not at all actually. I moved around a lot growing up, so it is the people I grow attached to instantly, and the place isn’t too much of significance to me. Don’t get me wrong, my soul aches for new places and adventure under the same sun immersed with people alike, yet significantly contrasted to myself! However, that’s what it is- the people. Who will I apologize to for knocking them over with my backpack as we try to cram into a tiny bus? Who is going to be my taxi driver from city to city, and how will their life look different than mine? Who will I try to haggle with in the markets, and is this how they feed their entire family? What smile will embrace me through the sweat pouring down their face, as they labor for hours on end? What sweet little hands will grab mine to catch my attention and want to play games? Who are they, really? What desires has God placed inside of them? Who has their heart, and what takes their time?
I’ve been asked “Won’t it be hard to pack up your whole life and just leave?”. The answer, for me, is not at all! I welcome it, in fact I thrive in it! I have desired to do just that for as long as I have had a dream. My struggle is leaving the people. Whether it be leaving my best friends here for them to gain a new routine that doesn’t involve me, or missing my little sisters 9th birthday. It will be the little kiddos that have engraved themselves into my heart the moment I heard their first care-free laughing, or the woman who has taken interest in who I am and has given me precious wisdom from her life in a different culture. My heart will break over, and over, and continually for the next year of my life. I already know this, and if you knew me just a little bit, you would hold the same truth for me.
Home is not a specific place for me, it lies within the presence of those who have loved me even when I am a mess! It is taking a summer nights drive with my best friend and hearing the lyrics of an old song. It will be travel days, the in-between ministries, which will in itself, become it’s own time of loving the community I will be in. It will be that day where we are done with our “ministry” and we are hot, exhausted, and wondering how we ended up in a tent in Africa; together.
Most of my favorite moments, are those nameless moments. I love every adventure I can grab onto, but the real moments are the ones doing nothing with people that have become significant to me. “Home” will be calling my best friend and hearing her call me that annoying nickname that I secretly love. “Home” will become watching the same sun I know, setting over different lands. “Home” will be staying up late with my teammates and talking about how God spoke to us this time, in this country, this day, in this moment. “Home” will be a lot of little things that I have yet to dream, because even my biggest imagination does not compare to His plan.
For me, Home, can be found anywhere. It is found in the people that He has loved me enough to place in my life. Home, is finding myself in His presence, because that is the only eternal Home that I have ever found.
I am so excited to go in search of my new homes, new souls that mine craves to finally sync with! So, no, I’m not afraid to leave my “home”; because you see, I can find Home anywhere with Him.
