We’re currently staying at the Kid’s International Ministry House in Pa Ming, Philippines. The other night Tara, Theresa, and I got to help the older girls shower and get ready for bed. Once the girls were showered and changed into their pajamas, Theresa read them a bedtime story. After that…lights out. We gave each girl a hug and kiss before sending them to bed. And they came back. Not a big deal, one more hug, one more kiss. And then they came back again. And again. And again. We must have given each girl at least a dozen hugs and good night kisses before finally tucking them in.
We went outside on the front steps to pray over these girls. I was (am) so broken for them. I wonder how often they’re hugged and kissed. I wonder how often someone takes them by the hand, looks them directly in the eye, and tells them “you are so beautiful“. They’re so thirsty for that love and attention! But as I hold them and tell them how beautiful they are, their response is always, “no, you are beautiful”. These girls want lighter hair, whiter skin, etc. It’s funny because I have lighter hair and skin, and I would MUCH rather look like these beautiful little girls. Which makes me wonder…
As my heart breaks for these girls, for their inability to see their true beauty, can I relate to God? Every time I wish my curly red hair away, does God’s heart break? Every time I wish I were taller, thinner, had different feautures…does God’s heart break? Has God been trying these last 22 years to tell me that I’m beautiful? Have I been ignoring Him? Have I cheapened His creation? His blessing? His delight in me?
This morning, i’m deciding to change my mind and attitude about all this. Not just for myself, or for the girls here at the orphanage…but for my King. Father, I’ve cheapened the works of Your hands. I’ve second-guessed the unique and individual beauty of Your creation, and i’m sorry Father. These girls are so beautiful. My team is beautiful. And so am I. Thank you for the blessing of beauty, God. Give us your eyes to see it. Amen!
