we were in a children’s school in Guatemala City talking to the six graders there about the world race and what we’re doing when we opened the floor for them to ask us any questions they might have. one kid piped up and asked “what was it you expected to see when you left on this trip?”
dang. what a powerful question.
and honestly, I still don’t know how to answer it. what was I expecting when I came on the race? I’m sure if you’ve asked me this before I’ve given an answer similar to “oh, I don’t have any expectations. I just want god to work freely and see how he moves” but in all reality, that was a lie. unintentionally I’ve had expectations for the race and to be honest, it is NOTHING like I imagined it would be.
i thought this race would be me easily immersing myself into their culture for a month, coming along side them and improving their lives. showing them how jesus was the answer to all their problems and if they would just give it all to god, everything would turn out okay. i put these peoples real life struggles into a box and labeled it as “damaged, needs north American to tell them god is the answer” i made it seem like their problems only existed while i was there, that after i left something suddenly switched and their lives were no longer in need of god’s help.
it’s harder than you think to go into a ministry for a month, pour your entire heart and soul into it knowing that in 30 days or less you would have to pack up and leave, just to start the process all over again. it’s challenging to go feed the homeless one night and realize that your one meal, while it’s greatly appreciated, doesn’t fix their situations. it’s even hard to walk past all the dogs without homes, seeing their ribs sticking out knowing that they don’t get loved on (like I think they should get loved on)
all these things are difficult. which is when I realize that I couldn’t imagine the heartbreak I would feel for them if I did all these things without the intentions of showing them how much god loves them. each ministry I partner with is apart of ‘the solution.’ they are helping poverty stricken people learn ways to provide for their family. they are helping end hunger in the local villages. they are giving orphans a home. all of these acts are incredibly impactful and incredibly needed but without the love of god radiating through every inch of their space, all their works are futile.
so here is where i bind those expectations and i release them to god. i want to spend the last six months of my race looking for god in every face i see and every situation i encounter and not limiting him to the situations i feel he’s needed the most. if there is one thing I’ve learned this far on the race it’s that god will show up at any time and in any place. actually, he’s already there.
