I have been pondering the best way to blog about my experience at training camp and have been unsure how to go about it. It has been very difficult for me to put my experience at camp into words and describe it to anyone. In the middle of the night this week it occurred to me the best way to do this is share a letter I wrote to God while at camp.
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Dear Father,
I am just 2 days away from the end of training camp. Without a doubt this has been one of the most beautiful and challenging weeks of my life. Coming into this week I had no idea what to expect but I desperately hoped for there to be change in me… in my heart. This last year I have realized that there are some pretty strong walls I have built up and I know that they have been preventing me from growing the fire in my spirit for you that I have truly desired. These walls I have spent my entire life building and have struggled to find a way to demolish them… especially because it is so safe behind them.
This week you made it abundantly clear there were some things I had to accept before these walls would come crashing down. The first being, that I am a worthy child of yours. Prior to this week I never knew that this was something I needed validated and even found it strange when you kept telling me this over and over again during the week. You knew I wasn’t getting it and even delivered the message to me through my squad mates… finally I got it! It was incredible how relieved I felt when this sunk deep into my heart. Each day I hope this plays on repeat for me so I never doubt it again. After accepting your love for me I have in turn realized that I can love others whole heartedly and be loved the same by others. You have placed me with a squad full of the most loving people I have ever met; what a beautiful blessing you have given me.
I can honestly say that those strong walls I have spent my entire life building are coming down and that the fire in my spirit for you is growing. You have assured me that it will continue to grow to be large and bright. This week has forever changed me and I have fallen more and more in love with you. This next year will be wild and incredible. Thank you for your never-ending love and faithfulness.
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Today I found out that I am due to be in Atlanta on the evening on January 5th and that we launch for the field on January 9th. Very exciting!! Please continue to pray for us as we prepare to leave and continue fundraising.
My Squad
My Team
Please consider supporting my mission trip by clicking on the Support Me! link on the left hand side. I need to raise about $2,500.00 more by December 18th to meet my next deadline.
Thank you so much for your continued prayers and support. Love you guys!
