Nobody ever told me how freaking powerful I am.
Let me tell you why.
I come from a normal, middle class family
and I don't hold any special titles
or positions of influence.
I don’t own a gun,
I’m kind of scared of them.
I barely have any money to my name.
And I’m not physically strong by any means.
In fact, my muscles are borderline pathetic.
By the standards of the world,
I probably don’t make it onto any of America’s watch lists.
BUT maybe I should…
because I’m in possession of a deadly weapon.
Actually, whether you realize it or not
everyone is given this same general weapon.
And for some crazy reason God decided
to give a powerful, special version of it to me-
as a gift.
But please
before you start thinking
how lucky and blessed I am,
let me tell you a little bit about my gift…
With this gift-
I have the power to bring life,
but I can also cause death in an instant.
Literally, I only need a few seconds
to completely destroy someone.
I actually have the ability
to create the environment in which people live.
And at times, I am the determining factor
as to whether someone has a good day,
or the absolute worst day of their life.
I influence the reputations of people.
Even worse, I can affect their character.
I really do have the power to totally change
the way a person thinks about himself.
I have the potential to boldly bring the truth.
Or sometimes I’m just the match that sparks the flame
in an intense wildfire of disaster.
Maybe you think I’m exaggerating,
but I promise you I’m not.
WORDS.
I love them and I hate them.
I started praying a little while ago,
asking God to show me how He’s gifted me.
And last month He made it abundantly clear
through different people and situations,
that one of my gifts is words.
Apparently, when I open my mouth
people are listening.
Sounds glamorous?
Its NOT. Not all the time.
One morning last month in Zim,
the weight of this gift hit me so hard
and I was literally stuck on the floor
face down, weeping.
In that moment I realized,
that as much as I use words for good things,
I also use them to bring so much…crap.
Verses flooded my mind
about the power of the tongue
and how difficult it is to control.
In James 3 it says
if anyone doesn’t stumble in what he says
he is a perfect man
also able to control his whole body.
Even more intense is Matthew 12
where it says that one day
I will have to give an account
for every word I’ve spoken,
and by my words I’ll be judged.
I begged God to please just take the gift away.
I was pinned to the floor by words I had spoken-
sarcasm I took too far
judgments I made about others
passive comments towards my teammates
disrespecting authority I didn’t agree with
careless joking
hypocritical things I said but never really lived
words I spewed out of anger
or bitterness
or to cover up my insecurities
and on and on and on…
But then I pictured Jesus.
On the cross. Beaten.
For every careless word I’ve ever spoken.
And I knew in that moment,
that God was telling me to get up.
To stop spitting on the cross
by trying to give back what He’s blessed me with.
But to walk confidently in my calling and gifting
with humility and grace.
And to keep on doing what I love to do.
Which is to write
and to speak into other people
and to call them up towards Life
through encouragement and love,
and as of lately…to preach.
But that’s another blog.
Thank you God for such a powerful gift.
Thank you for the grace to mess it up sometimes.
And thank you for loving me enough to lift me up off the floor.
May the words of my mouth
and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing to You, Lord
my Rock and my Redeemer
