I cried the other night because of these kittens that I couldn’t save. I felt so helpless. I had to just walk away. I wondered why I hadn’t cried before when there were people in similar conditions that I had to walk away from, but I think I was more prepared for that and I guess I believed that there would always be someone to come along behind me. But, the more I think about it, I believe my Mom was right; my
tears were for all the injustices of the weak, abandoned and the forgotten of the world that I’ve walked away from this year. The ones thrown to the side to fend for themselves, and no one would say it out loud, but hopefully to die. When they’re dead you can finally forget because then, at least, they are no longer suffering and no longer tormenting your conscience.
I had to carry the kitten back to the ditch, turn and walk away back to the comforts and provision of my everyday life. I knew I was returning it to inevitable death, but really would its’ life have been much better? People of the third world don’t really have the luxury to care for their animals as well as they should. Do you feed the dog who is skin and bones or your kid who hasn’t eaten a fulfilling meal in days? The animals here roam freely and reproduce rapidly. Two more kittens are two more too many for anyone to look after when another baby always seems to be on the way.
I usually have ideas of how to make situations better… with the third world animals, I have no idea. Mostly, I have come to accept or at least try to ignore the nagging of my heart at the sight of another skinny/mangy dog or weakly little cat. I can’t go around spaying and neutering every cat and dog or feeding every hungry mouth that looks my way – nor can I adopt every orphan, shelter all the homeless or save every neglected child.
The cry of the kitten lasting long into the night outside my window was the cry of the forgotten of this world. They are forgotten because when they cry no one hears, but that night I heard. I cried out to God; ‘Stop the crying, ease their suffering!’ I don’t want to hear it because I don’t know how to fix it. No one really want to hear it or see it if they are honest with themselves. Everyone else who saw the kitten I was holding walked away; made a sad face or comment and walked away. I was left standing alone in the
rain torn between what I wished I could do and what my current options were. Leave the burden of another (highly needy) pet on an already overworked family or put it back, where it was purposely abandoned, to continue on the course originally intended for it… neither being options I liked. My decision cried into my ears long into the night. I shoved my iPod music in and turned up the volume so I wouldn’t hear the kitten’s weakening cries, but the blasting music was only a reminder of what I was trying to
forget.
It is hard once you see the pain and injustice going on in the world. You become, sometimes unwillingly, responsible for what you see and experience. OK, now I know, what am I going to do about it – what
can I do about it?! I could tell others, but they haven’t yet seen it, only heard and it is so easy to forget and ignore. At this point they still have a chance to dodge the responsibility of action, so they keep hearing and forgetting – it is easier. I can try to get people motivated enough to see, but that is much harder because once you tell them and they see your burden, most will choose the easy way. Can I blame them? It is
easier. But, an easy life is not what we’re called to and deep down I believe everyone desires more (
1Peter 4:12-16). Somehow we know that it is not the life that will bring the most fulfillment, the most
joy – it is not the life Jesus lived or wants His followers to emulate.
A reoccurring theme in my life, in my heart, is to be a voice for the voiceless, a proclaimer of injustice and a thinker of the forgotten. My heart aches over the smallest things that have no power over their circumstance. My soul breaks and my insides rage at the money driven destruction of the Earth, the irresponsible treatment/killing of animals and the constant neglect of the starving, homeless and orphaned of this world, but too often I leave it there, on the inside. I do what others do and try to forget.
I feel powerless, insignificant and weak. What can I do to change any of this? What can I do that will really matter or make a difference? Those lies (from the enemy) run through my mind and take over my actions, reducing them to the minimal. The questions I should be asking; what can
God do about this? What does
He want me to do? What difference can
God make in this circumstance? The possibilities are endless. The obedient are few.
The course my life is taking me and that I so desire to follow, is to be one of the obedient. Not only obedient to God’s call on all believers as a whole, but more specifically to be obedient to His specific and purposed call on my life. While God calls all believers to follow Him, He is calling us individually to follow the plan He laid out for each of our lives so that as
one Body we will be advancing His Kingdom with the most effectiveness and greatest power possible. Just think how unstoppable the Body would be if
all believers were following God’s specific plan for their life and living
fully alive?! Too many of us settle for a life that gets us by and one day soon, gets us to heaven. But, what about here, what about now? Eternity starts today! (
John 17:2-4)
You are not a Christian so you can go to heaven. You follow Christ because you believe there is something
bigger than yourself out there that is worth fighting for, living for and dying for, because that is what He did for you. There is open opposition against us everyday – every second, fighting just as hard to keep us from becoming who God intended us to be. We are saved, we’re going to heaven, so the enemy’s intent is to keep us down and keep us distracted. If we never know what we’re missing by not becoming fully alive in Christ the enemy is gaining ground here on Earth and winning battles against people who don’t even know they are fighting (
Revelations 12:10-12).
Open your eyes Church, rise up men of God, get on your knees women and pray! Repent, for the Kingdom of God is at hand. (
Matthew 3:2, 4:17)
