Dear depression,
Let me tell you about it. You have been a constant with me since high school. It’s weird to think about that and how you have made me grow in so many ways I didn’t think were remotely possible. You’ve taught me what it looks like to be so deep into it, that even the closest people to me are hard to talk to because it’s so exhausting. You have drained me, kept me down, and even made me miss out on some fun things.
You are forgetting one thing though, Jesus. Jesus conquers all. He’s been more of a constant then you have, he’s been there at my lowest, he’s heard my cry, he’s heard my pain, he’s always there. Jesus thank you for being everything, what an awesome God we serve.
Leaving for the race I thought to myself, “man it will be fine you will be fine and it will all go away.”
Let me tell you, it stayed. Now your probably wondering “well if you pray about it Jesus will take it away.” Trust me I have. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. The cool thing I have learned is that every single person experiences pain no matter what life they live. I would consider these trials. I also have learned through my hard times of my low points with my depression, Jesus is using me to reach the unreached of the world. I’ve learned that my words have more power and more drive to me, then anything. I’ve learned to know that my story and what I struggle with could bring someone to Christ.
My friend told me that in the USA alone 16.2 million people struggle with depression, that really blew my mind. Another thing I’m learning is that Jesus puts people in your life to walk through the hard times. Jesus also tells us when two or more are gathered he is present. Prayer is so important, especially in the hard times.
What I am trying to say is that everyone struggles with something and you don’t know until you talk about it. I am so thankful for my team and leadership on my squad because they have made everything better. I decided to be vulnerable instead of covering it up with all the good times because I should be honest through it all. A verse comes to mind, which is Psalm 94:22 it says “But the Lord has been my defense, And my God the rock of my refuge” that verse has meaning to me because leaning on God through the hard times and him always being there no matter what.
Jesus is amazing y’all, he will get you through anything.
Love you momma ??
Blessings
Layne
