The first thing I would think about this title is “Oh, how cliche”. Well, it kind of is but it is the one thing that might be the perfect fit for the thoughts running through this fast moving mind of mine and might be the perfect statement for EXACTLY where I am at right now.
Well, good morning to my fellow blog readers! I am sitting outside here, at a local coffee shop (my favorite place ever!). My feet are up and my coffee is sitting next to me as I listen to my Jesus tunes and watch cars go way too fast through the streets of the square and the leaves change on this crisp, perfect, fall morning in Georgia. Gosh, I could end there BUT I won’t.
The past month has been a whirlwind of emotions, thoughts, and crazy! I believe I have mentioned before that I never thought I would actually say yes to The World Race and if I haven’t, then I just did! The reason why is because: seriously? a year away from home? I don’t think so. Well, that has all changed. I have never felt more confident in my decision to leave and follow where the Lord is leading me. I TRUST Him with all I have. It is definitely scary at times to think that I am going to be away for just shy of an entire year, yes, 11 months. 11 months without of the comfort of a couch and a TV and my mom to do the dishes or my dad to take us out to dinner or my queen size bed with a nice, fluffy, down comforter with a 36 inch TV mounted on the wall where I can fast forward through commercials because “ain’t nobody got time for that”. I have never been more ready to escape that, it is just too much and sometimes overwhelming just to think about how much I do have. I want to live simply, I want to be able to clearly hear the Lord and see what He has for me without distraction.
“But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation”
Psalm 13:5
So, what have some of my crazy thoughts and stuff been lately? Let me tell you, too much. Two things that have been really hitting me hard are:
1. How the heck am I going to meet my first deadline of $3,500 let alone the whole $16,500?
Ha, the answer to this question, TRUST. Would you look at that, who knew that could have been that simple? Seriously though, I trust Him, I have to. My fear of not meeting my deadline is not of the Lord in the first place and I think He has been pretty clear that this trip is what He has in His plans this year. I have seen donations from team members, people I haven’t spoken to in years, and people from different religions. If that doesn’t speak volumes, I don’t know what does. I am still $405.00 away from my deadline TOMORROW! It is natural for me to freak out but you know what? I am not going to because I have that much TRUST in my God and I just feel like the funds are in there and they just have not processed yet.
2. The whole “I am going away for a year” thing is really starting to hit me.
That thought makes you feel a little funky because there are so many emotions attached to that. I am really going to miss my family, I am really going to miss my friends. It feels as though I will be saying goodbye forever but I’m not, it is JUST a year. I’ll give you a little look into what some of those emotions are.
I don’t want my family to miss me too much or worry about me but, they will, it is only natural. I don’t want my friends to forget about me and find new ones. Well, that is selfish of me. No, not really, it is just fear in me and I have to let that go because, truth is, I don’t have a remote with a pause button. I know things will change and I will change so the challenge is finding that contentment.
So, back to that TRUST thing. It is crazy what is does when you have trust. It is so freeing and makes things so much easier. Provision happens, things fall into place, miracles happen, the unbelievable becomes believable, and what seems to be impossible becomes possible.
So I end with this:
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders…take me deeper than my feet could ever wander”
If you feel led to give go to
lauryngondek.theworldrace.org and click the “Support Me” tab under my picture on the left hand side of the page. All donations are greatly appreciated and I definitely need prayers so please, pray on!
xo
Lauryn
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation
