It’s the first of many blogs that will describe my time at training camp. Even though it was only 8 days, it was 8 days of eye opening, wall breaking, change and unexplainable joy.
I went into the week not knowing what would happen, but God did. He started providing even before I made it to camp. God showed up at a gas station where he laid to rest my anxiety about showing up awkwardly by myself. He answered my prayers with 3 girls, one who would become a very needed friend. Training camp hadn’t even started but God was at work, I knew he would continue to provide and show up.
Once we arrived at camp we set up camp, ate, then started our night session. The next day we got up hiked, breakfast, morning session, mid-morning session, pre-lunch session, lunch, afternoon session, another session, crisis game, Dinner, night session, and the next day we did it all over again! Needless to say we had a jam packed week of the World Race staff filling us with information and lessons that would make the next 11 months of our lives the best they can be.
At every session we had a great worship team that consisted of people who had all gone on the Race before us. They did an outstanding job of leading us in corporate worship. One night we had a night just for us to worship. It was a night that we wanted the holy spirit to be evident in our midst and we wanted to praise God for all that he was doing in us.
It seemed like it would be an awesome night of just unrestrained worship with no cares about the people around you (which it was don’t read me wrong). But for me I deal with comparison and caring to much about what people think. It’s a problem I thought I had dealt with but it reared its head at what seemed the most inopportune moment. On this night God knew exactly what was going to happen and I am so glad. I began to look around to see what others were doing. I compared myself and started to doubt myself. I thought: Why am I not worshipping like they are? Am I missing something? Am I not seeking God like they are? But the verse that always rings in my head Galatians 1:10 came to mind and I began to pray and talk to God. I needed his conformation.
And there among the singing and wonderful loud music I heard Him, a comforting restful whisper. (1 Kings 19:11-12) Just enough to say to me…Lauren I am here I have always been here. At that moment I felt Him and I knew that no matter what happens with other people or how they worship that God has always been with me and always will. The way he talks to me doesn’t have to look like everyone else and thats okay because the only person I have to please is God. I hope you hear Jesus today and it doesn’t matter what way, just know his voice.
I love the hymn “In the Garden” it was my Mama Jean’s favorite and I love the confidence and the sweetness of the relationship.
“He speaks, and the sound of His voice,
Is so sweet the birds hush their singing,
And the melody that He gave to me
Within my heart is ringing.
And He walks with me, and He talks with me,
And He tells me I am His own;
And the joy we share as we tarry there,
None other has ever known.”
This is the kind of relationship I want!!!
